Meet Again

Love takes over all humans

I saw you standing next to a bar

I saw you driving your car

I saw you on magazine covers

The thought of you

 

Makes me see lovers

 

My eyes widen

My mouth drops

My mind feels dreamy

I reach out a photo

 

A memory of you

 

A flash that left you in surprise

You didn't think I would hide

But I was desperate

To have you in my hands

 

As a picture at least

 

Every moment alone

I start dreaming of you

I feel so much excitement

Of sending you my number

 

I make you smile by calling you when I get home

 

If our eyes meet again

That's when I will have my chance

I want to meet you tomorrow

So don't be late

 

Or I'll be waiting for you to come at eight

 

At my home

We will share a bottle

I will cook for you

But please come

 

You can guess how much I need you

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Tina Kline]

A strong sense of being needed come from these words, perhaps the person is really coming or perhaps its all just a painful dream never to be fulfilled.

[R J Askew]

Ach, you make me want to be esp nice, so that my loved one might think a little like that of me. I can't be sure that I will succeed, but the notion of your poem makes me thing the effort will be worth it. Well done. Your poem reminds me of what love is.

[Bridget Mcmaken]

very nice poem. great work. I truly love it.

[Jim]

Great poem. I like the stanza arrangements--four line stanzas followed by one line stanzas seem to fit the mood well. I also like the repetition of "I saw" and "My" in the opening stanzas. On the constructive criticism side, I'd recommend some more detail toward the end, maybe some images or scenes. For instance, you could specify a bottle of what, and what exactly the speaker will cook. I love detail when it comes to food--that's my readerly bias, I guess.

[Cynthia]

Nice Work!

[Magdelena]

I saw the first lines and thought of a magazine picture of a model of sorts, then as I got lower I then saw something else. Two meanings I received. yet each came form one feeling. The desperation, yes, of a love for someone they can't have. The feeling of loosing control in a way, begging, reaching out.. All in all, I really liked this. it says allot on what many woman and men, feel in today's times when they fall for someone they can not have.

Mags xx

[Charles]

You had me going for a moment with the first 5 lines - I thought I'd see a pattern with the shape of the poem and the rhyming scheme... maybe it would be fun to try to mimic these lines with a pattern in mind. The shape (4 line stanzas interrupted with single line stanzas) is easy to read, almost creates a sense of serenity, which the subject doesn't of course. I think I'd look at lines 9 and 20 (one needs a 'for' and the other might be shortened for eye and ear appeal). Overall, a well done piece of writing.

[Cassiopia Summers]

This piece does indeed scream desperate. I mean, it's a good poem voicing desperation, and it flows real well, but I don't like it. It's just not my taste, with that said. IT is in fact a great poem, It flows easily, it's got a great idea, and it has great words. You are indeed a fantastic writer, keep it up.

[Star Wolf]

This write has a little edge of desperation but over all it has a positive feel to it. I'm sure as soon as he gets there the edge will be gone. Amazing job.

[TAO]

To have you in my hands
As a picture at least

I liked these two lines. This hints at how clever you are. Overall, the poem was beautiful, as you likely know. These are words to soothe a beast, you know. Very good.