Murphy's Law

A story of life and death.

Running through this maze of life

hearing of the dangers
closest folk in time of strife
becoming perfect strangers.
Foolishly tugging
the end of the rope
pulling the noose
snug around my throat.
Time has diminished
the clock has no meaning
the vision is blurry
the people are fleeing.
I have a new guide
I have a new knife
I have a new hope
I'll start a new life!

Reviews

[Dinesh Sairam]

I don't know what the title has to do with the poem, but it pretty violently delirious. A good poem. :) Keep writing.

[Mike Lamb]

"snug around my throat" is the only line where the metre (meter? whatever) feels off. The number of syllables are fine (or with one less), but try shuffling the words around or substituting something. Maybe if you just drop "my." I trip over that word when I say the line. snug around throat? tightly round throat? around my frail (weak/choked/etc.) throat? tight across throat? I don't know, something like that. Otherwise solid.

[David W Moore III]

I love how this poem speeds almost to delirium at the end. Very well done. A couple typos - running and diminished, but great read. Thanks for sharing.