Smiles

Read of a simple man's work

one of meter and of rhyme

Whose tired footsteps echo

down the corridors of time

 

A torrid tale of longing

left by walks in thought and pain

Written for your reverence

not for authors only gain

 

For I'm a humble poet

of no specialty nor skill

Who sees the distant longing

of the child upon the hill

 

With days of constant labor

and long nights devoid of ease

I've seen the tops of mountains

Where the gods play as they please

 

Through haze and smoke deliver

my pen light upon the page

Records the music playing

from every day and age

 

To watch the gentle snowflake

alight soft on a child’s tongue

Releasing awe and wonder

of innocence in the young

 

While we the aged wonder

of moments no one could tell

Given no more to dreaming

our thoughts of where we last fell

 

For time is but an echo

of our loves felt, known and lost

Memories of our lives past

which were paid at such a cost

 

Let fly your soul immortal

stop to watch your children play

Their smiles define man's beauty

more than life could ever say

 

  

Author's Note

When we dream is it not the playful longings of the child upon the hill? Do those dreams not define our life's search and desires?

Reviews

[bluessadmood]

Oh God Mr Tate..i was so honored to review this masterpiece..
I would not expect nothing less from you..you know as i read it
I was like on a stage and you asked me to read it out loud
how exquisitely lovely it will come..i swear ..i felt it like a sypmphony
each group of words sounded like they were so high in pitch and then it got low
how you dessicate life and time ,how you humble yourself..God you were made for poetry
those tired footsteps down the lane of time telling tales of pain and ache and tired bones
its a constant labor and long and lonely nights still i stood on top of mountains where God used to play
my words though so hazed they would light a hundred miles from here to eternity and yet more
time only told how love was felt and lost ,lives lived and passed and just at what cost
what loveliness..great symphony from beginning to end..true master poet you are my friend
lovely write..

[The Wave]

Simply Amazing!
Well Written.
Good job.

[Sean M. Addams]

i liked this alot a very upbeat and moving piece...loved the imagery in this..overall nice job..a very superb piece!!

[Tommy]

With all the beauty that this piece conveys, I feel the final stanza stand out and says the truth about where beauty is truly found. Great write!
RLG,
Tommy

[MoonlitAngel]

Beautiful and sincere. Not much more to say.

[little lily Bride of Ch..]

Amazing work this is my Favorite line. "For I'm a humble poet
of no specialty nor skill
Who sees the distant longing
of the child upon the hill"


Well i will read some more of your poems later i must head off to bed nice work

[Andrew]

Amazing! I can't think of anything to say other than WOW and I appreciate that you thought of me in sending a request, a truly wonderful write!

[George Love]

One of your best and to tag it at the end with one of the most positive songs of all time was a stroke of genius. You aced this one, completely out of the park!

[Charles]

A few technical issues first. Line 8: authors needs an apostrophe. Line 9, I know the meter is there as is but I'd prefer I am to I'm (adds a soft beat, but a bit of irregularity doesn't hurt). Line 3 in stanza 8, reverse 'past' and 'lives' - there's no reason for the sentence distortion. Finally, the biggie! This poem really kicks into gear after the fifth stanza (the first 5 stanzas add details about the poet's background but don't do much to carry the reader into the really strong stanzas about children). Were this mine, I'd scrap the first five (maybe do another poem around them) and start with the really great line 'To watch the gentle snowflake' moving through the others to end with the very nice closing stanza. Another way to put this is that there seem to be two poems here, and I really like the second one. Just thoughts. :-)

[Tina Kline]

Impressive. As writers we record time, especially our own lives and how they world touches us, good and bad, but watching our children, we remember what it was all for, the good and bad our our lives, and know it was all worth it.