My Rhymes

I guess all the writers can relate to this one.. :)

When i sit back and write my rhymes,

In a dark room with all my thoughts,

I see you and all the times,

that we've been through...

No! I won't forget,

you left a scar,

right through my heart!

People if you don't get me,

Just let me,

Be what i have to be,

It's something you can never be..

They say i'm short-tempered,

But i say i wanna be remembered,

To leave a mark,

No! I'm not self-centered!

Think what you have to,

I'll still be with my rhymes in a dark room!
And when time comes,

I'll do what i have to,

I don't need no one to talk to...

Now,What you've done,times two,

Still i forgive,

We all have to live..

I'll live with my rhymes,

And you can live with what you've done!
Please do regret,

'Cuz i wanna see you like that...

Be afraid like a rat,

All around are traps..

Know that you suck,

You'll survive with a bit of luck!

I won't go easy on you,

I'm not like those few,

who ain't true,

to what they do...

I'll give it all,Be ready to fall,

With my words,with my rhymes,

I'm gonna take you down!

Author's Note

We all want to have success in our life..But not everyone can get it in the first try..
We are living in a world where you'll be mocked even for trying..And success is not for the ones who don't... The path to success might not be easy..But triers are the winners!
Thank you for your time..Please do review so that i can improve.. :)

Reviews

[Zequis]

I was told once that I would be a success if I'm pleased with what I do. Somehow that's never enough for me - I really want others to like what I do ... at least some of it ...
This is another great write. Your soul shines through your words. I don't see them as "self-centered" - - I see them more bold. Courageous. Nicely done.

[Aswin R Prasad]

And your review seems very frank and true .. i'll try writing more poems like these..
Glad you liked it..

But success is happiness..And if i get to do what i like..It's 'success' for me! :)

[Rye]

No! I'm not self-centered!
Think what you have to,
I'll still be with my rhymes in a dark room!

I so-loved this part, Very intense write indeed, creative and very well written

[Aswin R Prasad]

Thank you so much for your review.. Glad you liked it :)

[Rye]

no problem

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Wow! A passionate, intense write!
As a reader we can feel the turmoiled emotions of the narrator, of rage, struggle, disappointments and hope!
Very well penned!
Kudos!

PS: In the line - "I don't need no one to talk to", maybe you unintentionally have used two negatives. And if I am wrong, please let my suggestion go.

[Aswin R Prasad]

Thank you so much for your time and review..

And btw..that was intentional... ;) It's to bring a ring to it...
And yes..you are right.. :)

[Jyoti_Ablaze]

Oh I see
You are very welcome