The aspiring nurse..

dreams of another life.

And here I stand, defeated.

How familiar this feels. 

Another Sunday really...

I've drowned in the mess that wasn't mine,

in the house I do not own.

I suppressed the thought of another life,

to attend the screaming child. 

He coughs and spits his dinner onto the clean floor.

And that is it for me, I cannot take anymore. 

This life was not meant for me.

I lie in my bed and think. 

To be so trapped in a mother's body,

going through this life, a zombie.

I accidentally allow myself to dream,

beyond the bottles and the screams.  

To the life I'd always imagined,

the one that slipped through my hands. 

When I'm done, 

I pull myself up and wipe away the single tear.

Dragging myself back down the hall,

absent mindedly, I clean up and try again.

Defeated. 

Reviews

[Jennesis]

Phenomenal and raw. I think your sentiment here is common, but not many moms have the courage to speak of it. Bravo.

[ayejodie]

Thank you so much, Another amaing review from you, thank you!