your love is my drug

your love is my drug

A Poem by kayla garcia

            Your love is my drug

                           I can't be without it

                       with out you I can't consitrate
                                      
                                     your my life

                               i day dream about you

                             you mean the world to me

                         what would i do with out you

    

        P.S.Who are you?Have I found you?Do I know you?Are you in my life?   

© 2010 kayla garcia


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I am very much enjoying the concept of this write. I like how it turned out, but I think there are a few ways where you can build on what you have going here.

I like the title, it pulls me in very quickly.

I was thinking, that you could compare what drugs do to a person, to what this person does.

for example, how a drug alters your concentration, keeps you up at night, can get you hyper, get you mellow, get you angry, sad, change your perception.

It can do a lot of things...and I would of liked to have seen what your love does (keeping this thought of what drugs do)

Another tangent I would like to see is what it's like WITHOUT his/her love.

Somebody that uses drugs, without them, they go through withdrawals. They get headaches, aggravated, depressed, shakes, get cold, etc etc...

I think some sort of explanation like this in your poem would be awesome!

I definitely hope to see this develop into something more.

Thanks for the great concept and read!

-JH



Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

thanx

Posted 9 Years Ago


short but nice,great job

Posted 9 Years Ago


YAY

Posted 9 Years Ago


I really like this. Its simple but very well written. ~x~

Posted 9 Years Ago


thank you

Posted 9 Years Ago


aww such a touching piece it`s really sweet very nice :)

Posted 9 Years Ago


you all like it

Posted 9 Years Ago


I enjoyed this. I felt this way once or twice. Now that I'm close to having a "completely" finished book I'm not trying to fall hopelessly in love with anyone. lol
Did you mean to spell concentrate that way, to prove the point of not being able to concentrate? If so I thought that was brilliant and a great way to incorporate real human emotion into the poem.
Great job

Posted 9 Years Ago


thanx

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I know what you mean...

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on May 24, 2010
Last Updated on May 24, 2010

Author

kayla garcia
kayla garcia

marion, OH



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hi my names kayla garcia __♥__♥_____♥__♥__ Put this _♥_____♥_♥_____♥_ heart _♥______♥______♥_ on your .. more..

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