Grocery Swap

Grocery Swap

A Story by barleygirl
"

true story by a friend . . .

"

If you think I'm outspoken, my friend Debbie (known since high school) makes me look mealy mouthed. She just posted this on Facebook & this is an unbelievably true story, well told!


* * * * * * * *


I went to Whole Foods earlier to pick up a few things. I'm waiting in the checkout line and I dropped a $20 bill (yep that's me trying to hold everything, because I didn't want a cart). The lady in front of me picked it up. I thanked her and held my hand out, and she said, "The things found on earth are kept by the collector," and walks away.😡 I was like oh hell NO!! I looked at the person behind me standing in line, they couldn't believe it either.... this can't be real life right now, right?!

So I took a deep breath and I turned back towards the lady/thief/or whatever you wanna call her and as I approached her I said, "Do I look like I'm in the mood?! Let's not play games. Go ahead and give me back my money." Of course Paul is cringing this whole time, he knew there was no stopping me‼️


She had the nerve to ignore me completely and TRIED to walk away from me... SOOOOO, of course I left everything and followed her into the parking lot as I was calling the police (because of course somebody's about to go to jail... not sure who at this point though, her or me). She was almost running at this point to get away from me, which was the first sign of real intelligence this lady had shown. 😂 When she got to her car she put her bags on the ground trying to quickly get her trunk open.


I was boiling at this point! I decided that her “finders keepers" rule just presented the perfect opportunity for a great teachable moment... SO... I went into track star mode and ran full speed, and grabbed her grocery bags, and headed to my car yelling, "The things found on earth are kept by the collector!"
I hopped in my car ignoring her every attempt to get my attention. I was outta line I'll admit, but she was too. I was HOT, but I had a sense of satisfaction at the same time.


I get home and open the bags and what did I find?
3 packs of rib eye steaks
3 pounds of wild caught salmon
2 pounds of potatoes
Everything to make a bomb salad
And...
A bottle of Wine

I cant help but think to myself... WOW! Not bad for $20 dollars

© 2020 barleygirl


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Featured Review

Haha, funny story
Some complete t**d and his wife up our way cleaned out the entire meat section of a major grocery store
Who else matters?
Another mega-t**d grabbed every antiseptic wipes his empty pick-up could carry and is now flogging them on the internet for 4 times the price
I recently saw a vet stick his complete arm into a cow's wingwang and I am pretty sure that these two selfish turds were what he pulled out
And a pleasant evening 2U dearest Margie
May your days be lathered with peaches and cream and your life be the happiest dream

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Weeks Ago

Your attempts to be a sweetheart are netting some weird results, with someone's hand up a cow's wing.. read more



Reviews

What a great story! I probably would have done the same thing (an eye for an eye).... and so well told with vivid words (as usual) and funny to boot (not really!) especially what was in the grocery bag and the funny but true lines that follow!!! The wine may have been tasty! FUN!

Posted 1 Week Ago


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Gee
Love that...not bad for $20 :)))

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


Margie - I loved it!! Talk about poetic justice, Debbie had it given to her in spades! What a great friend is Debbie!

Thanks for sharing this - Dave

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Dave

2 Weeks Ago

More people should be so bold. Of course in today's culture so many might get shot!
Take car.. read more
barleygirl

2 Weeks Ago

Amen to the shooting comment! *smile*
Dave

2 Weeks Ago

Some world we have come to live in!

Take care - Dave
Really love your choice of words and the humor I think it was really cool. What stood out for me was the visualization words which I would call realism. Thumbs up

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

2 Weeks Ago

My friend Debbie isn't even a writer, but she did a great job building suspense as she tells her sto.. read more
Patrick kulture

2 Weeks Ago

Hahaha😊 she is not alone there I am trying to still express myself through poetry that’s why I .. read more
Patrick kulture

2 Weeks Ago

I am actually new in writing and would want to explore poetry that is why I am this platform.
Good for you lass

Better than me pushing the foot rest of wife's wheel chair into a fellas ankle who tried to push in front in a crowded shop
Med him hoppin mad

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

2 Weeks Ago

That is hilarious! A wheelchair battering ram! I run over my bare feet all the time, so I know how a.. read more
Wild Rose

2 Weeks Ago

Oh the shop was crowed just walking at a snails pace I was pushing Pam's chair keeping pace with tho.. read more
Not bad at all..the
thief lost more in the
long run..haha karma
(W)itch slapped her
a good one..


Posted 2 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

2 Weeks Ago

I wish I had the spunk to respond in the moment . . . I usually think of the best replies or actions.. read more
Ps at least the other lady hadn’t bought bulk bird seed and dog food

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Weeks Ago

Julie, I got your great shares in your FB message, but I cannot respond to you on FB anymore . . . s.. read more
Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)

3 Weeks Ago

Ten years on fb didn’t want to do twenty lol if I live that long
Xx 💋
Hahaha. An eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth. She lost more of what she gained in her eyes. In this kind of times we live in, I believe it and more. Thank you for sharing this Margie.

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Weeks Ago

This area is "country" (even our small cities) & people are usually so kind & generous & trusting. I.. read more
Sami Khalil

3 Weeks Ago

I do agree. Hugs)))
You are welcome.
This is such a fantastic tale of retribution Margie! She was so sassy, gutsy and delivered the perfect punch! Yeah! Give it as good as you get. With some folks this is all that works. Love it. Love it. Love it.

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Weeks Ago

I'm the kind of person who stands there, not being able to find words when people are unbelievably r.. read more
Rania

3 Weeks Ago

You are delightful my dearest friend! So welcome always ❤️ Hugs!
i loved your story margie.
i think i would've let fly with a few expletives when that woman 'stole' that $20.
i'm not sure it would've occurred to me to follow her & purloined her groceries. good on your friend debbie, she did well hahaha 😀😆 i like a person with spunk 👍
bet that greedy woman won't do that again.

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

barleygirl

3 Weeks Ago

Debbie is the bad a*s we all wish we could remember to be, at just the right moment. Yet, she does h.. read more

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16 Reviews
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Added on March 16, 2020
Last Updated on March 16, 2020

Author

barleygirl
barleygirl

Central Coast, CA



About
Just loving life & sharing my blessings. more..

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