Grip (revised)

The depths of darkness hold me tight
I pray that I can sleep tonight
The scratching sounds inside my head
Make me want my life to end

This blackness makes a nasty sheath
I can't get out from underneath
No one seems to understand
I can't get out of this dark land

The monsters here are standing guard
I don't know when life got so hard
I push and shove and kick and fight
I'm losing sight of all my light

I'm stuck inside my own four walls
Running through these blackened halls
I try and try but cannot shout
The monsters here won't let me out

So I hold on tight and try to breathe
I hold back all my piercing screams
I must push these monsters out the door
For if I don't, I'll be no more.

Reviews

[Tomoe Tellez]

I feel exactly like this every now and then, I guess sometimes I just forget I'm locked into my own self. When you have an inner battle it is you against yourself, so when you win, you also lose. That's why I really love your poem, this one is going to my library. 100 POINTS!

[RJ Humphries]

Wow, what a deep, meaningful poem.
It's harrowing and brilliant and beautiful.
The detailed descriptions really helped me to picture this scenario playing out in front of me.
Such haunting imagery - very well written!

- RJ Humphries

[Hakim]

Great poem. Almost felt like i was watching a 1 minute horror film. very detailed feelings.

[Celie Rose]

You are deep! I felt your emotion as I read. I really liked the part where you said, "No one seems to understand, I can't get out this dark land. I'm stuck inside my own four walls, Running through these blackened halls." I've been there. Well written!

[Coyote Poetry]

The poetry took the reader to dangerous places and thoughts.
"I know I must get this under control
For if I don't, I'll exist no more."
The above lines stood out. To exist no-more. Is a bad ending. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote