her existence

her existence

A Poem by Bella

She feels agitated and anxious.
Always on edge,
Waiting for something but not expecting anything.
She doesn't think she should be here but she is,
And she should.
Looming presence of paranoia and grey.
Tears are felt but no tears are shed.
She feels so full yet she is an empty shell waiting to be filled.
Hoping to be loved and feel wanted,
But is loved and wanted everywhere she goes.
Thinks her presence takes up too much room,
And thinks she should disappear.
Her presence fills the empty space
That others so longed to be filled.
She feels invisible walking down the street,
Yet all eyes are felt resting on her.
She's scared and she's frightened.
She feels the urge to ruin something, 
To break herself.
She doesn't want her life to be ruined.
She knows she has time but she feels the constant pressure,
"Do something."
She feels like a failure.
She's told she's not.
She thinks she's a disappointment, and in some ways,
She is.
She wants help but keeps thinking,
Maybe it's just her?
Maybe it's in her head, maybe it isn't real.
She has so many thoughts running wild, 
Bouncing back and forth like a broken record,
Skipping.
If you asked her what she was thinking about,
She wouldn't be able to tell you.
She thinks she is lovable, 
Doesn't think anyone can love her.
Why does it feel like someone is out to get her,
When no one is?

© 2018 Bella


My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Reviews

Doesn't think anyone can love her.
Why does it feel like someone is out to get her,
When no one is?

I love how you use "She" so many times , and questioning yourself so many times


Posted 5 Years Ago



Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

73 Views
1 Review
Rating
Added on November 11, 2018
Last Updated on November 11, 2018
Tags: mental health, perspective, poetry, imagery, feelings, empty

Author

Bella
Bella

United Kingdom



About
I have written a lot over the course of my life, most of it probably never to be seen, but I am interested and excited to learn, grow and share. I'm 17 and currently most of what I write is modern po.. more..

Writing
thank you thank you

A Poem by Bella


i think? i think?

A Poem by Bella


being honest being honest

A Poem by Bella