Your eyes

Your eyes

A Poem by LadySoDivine
"

Please read author's comment before reviewing!

"
Your eyes
By Dusan Kostic

And so as we slowly walk on the beach
The sunset is shooting the last rays of light
On your tanned face.

I see the purity and freedom in your eyes,
The days passing by,
But your eyes still look the same.

They're still looking at me,
Telling me that my presence is
Important to you.

So I grant you with a kiss on your eyes
Every day, in hope they will stay
The same as every day.

© 2013 LadySoDivine


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Author's Note

LadySoDivine
This poem is not mine. My boyfriend wrote this. I just uploaded it because we would both like to hear some constructive and objective opinions on his writing. He's a musician first and he usually uses my poems and makes music that fits them. But I think that he could write his own lyrics as well. I personally believe that he has potential to become a good writer, with a little more practice and reading other work. He thinks he's not good at all and I wish to prove him wrong. So I would like to hear what you think, some suggestions, anything you believe would help him improve his skills. Thank you very much in advance! :)

My Review

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Reviews

Another review AFTER reading your author's note: He's definitely got talent, and he needs to hear it. At least one person believing in you can make all the difference in the world.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

LadySoDivine

6 Years Ago

I agree very much on that. Thank you so much for your kind words, I'll make sure to tell him :)
Tell your b/f nice job...instinctual and sensitive. Good qualities for male writers.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A beautiful poem for love. It is gentle and powerful. You boyfriend did well. Thank you for the excellent poetry.
Coyote

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

LadySoDivine

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much for your kind words :)
Whaooo!!!! Totally beautiful, I loved it.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Tell him its good and to do or show more

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

LadySoDivine

6 Years Ago

Thank you for the review, I'll make sure to tell him that :)
this is great..!!
well done..!!

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

LadySoDivine

6 Years Ago

Thank you :)
Saumya

6 Years Ago

you are highly welcomed..!!! :)
Sounds to me like he is in love...this was very nice. Tell him, good job.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

LadySoDivine

6 Years Ago

Thank you Jack, I will :)

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257 Views
7 Reviews
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Added on May 25, 2013
Last Updated on June 21, 2013

Author

LadySoDivine
LadySoDivine

About
Hi there. :) I'm an 18-year-old girl and I simply love to write. I made an account here to hear some objective opinions on my writing and to share my thoughts with fellow writers of the world. I am a.. more..

Writing