Where did I go wrong?

A song lyric :)

 

 

...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

WHERE DID I GO WRONG?

 

 

 

Whenever I asked you this question you remained quiet,

But now I have realized,

“Where did I go wrong?”

And “where were you right?”

 

{Verbal acoustics}

 

I just got into my bed alone tonight,

With the bed still made up on your side.

And I count days like years and months like centuries,

With dry tears flowing from my eyes like dead autumn leaves.

 

Since now I have realized,

“Where did I go wrong?”

 

Ah huh, ah huh huh…

{Verbal acoustics}

 

It felt so great when you were by my side,

And how we used to held each other so tight.

Gone are those days and I’m left with pain,

Since I have realized that you won’t be back again.

 

Because it was just me who went wrong,

It was just me who went wrong.

 

Ah huh, ah huh huh…

{Verbal acoustics}

 

 

I was just so wrong when I let you go,

And let you walk away from my life.

Forever and ever and ever……

 

 

(Piano solo)

 

 

Since now I have realized,

“Where did I go wrong?”

And “where were you right?”

 

I was just so wrong when I let you go,

And let you walk away from my life.

Forever and ever and ever……

 

(Fades out…)

 

 

 

Reviews

[Imperfection]

Have you tried your hand at lyrics before? I'm unable to recall if I've read lyrics from you before this.
This is a good one�
You've captured a range of emotions here. Overwhelming feelings�.the longingness, pining, regret and love.

The line that touched me most is - I was just so wrong when I let you go�
It surely has a reverberating effect.

Well, the remaining part of the piece is just as effective. The visuals your words create are fantastic too.
Consider this as an example:
I just got into my bed alone tonight,
With the bed still made up on your side.
And I count days like years and months like centuries,
With dry tears flowing from my eyes like dead autumn leaves.

And yet the piece doesn't seem quite whole to me�since I don't yet know how the song will sound like.

The pictures again are appropriate. I loved the first one�the person singing the song, maybe?
Yes. I believe so.

Good attempt.

P. S. I think you meant quiet in the first line (as opposed to quite).

[talulu love]

good job homey

[Pratibha]

Hi Bhavya, lucky are those around you because you are a sensitve and sensible person. And indeed it's because of your Mother. Stay this way always !

[Flow~]

I love the music in poetry, finding the pulse of a poem can change its meaning. This one is wonderful wish I could hear the music behind the words~

[KAREN BROWN]

OMG I loved this. a lot of feeling, wonderfully written.I feel when you let someone go if they come back there yours to keep if they do not it wasn't meant to be.Its no bodys fault, its there or not if theres any question then it probally not going to be. thank u for sharing :)

[poetic soul]

I was just so wrong when I let you go,
And let you walk away from my life.
Forever and ever and ever��

these lines pinched me!! pierced me deep in.. this feeling is so bad na....

Loved this piece.. apt to be a song.... :)

Regards,
Poetic Soul

[Karl]

Wow! It will make a great song.

[Wicahpi]

I like, "Where did I go wrong? Where were you right?"
They are always the questions asked out of a broken relationship.
There are two sides to every story; mostly both being wrong and right.

In order for me to know if I liked the song, I'd have to hear the music.
Yes, I pay close attention to lyrics in a song; but the music is what captivates me.

A Suggestion Below:

And how we used to (held) each other so tight. ~ hold

Good Luck in the contest in which you posted this..

[Together]

Awww dude! This is so sad!

[Innocent]

I was just so wrong when I let you go,
And let you walk away from my life.
Forever and ever and ever�� - Great lines Bhavya! The rhythm is just so perfect!

[Amanda]

a sad, sad song....of lost love and the regret that letting go has caused.

nicely written with the flow being just so...i'd love to hear how this actually sounds like. you write ever so well, Bhavya and that is sooo good :)

A xox