Hungry spirits

Hungry spirits

A Poem by Latifa
"

loneliness is a dread,to find the one is tough especially in a time full of masked faces.

"
Deserted hearts sought to be dovetailed
Deserted hearts sought to be overwhelmed
Deserted hearts are in fear to wane
Deserted hearts are in want to reign

The vain spirit is growing tender
The vain spirit is willing to surrender
The vain spirit is gleaming with desire
The vain spirit refuse to douse the fire

© 2013 Latifa


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Reviews

I love this poem, my favorite line is

Deserted hearts sought to be overwhelmed

Keep Up The Good Work

Posted 10 Years Ago


I liked the flow of the rhythm you held into the piece.
Keep on!

Posted 10 Years Ago


The vain spirit is gleaming with desire
The vain spirit refuse to douse the fire

that's the spirit.
Loved the write dear :)
********************************************************************************************************************

Posted 10 Years Ago


mike emil approves
this is ripe for kohlrabi theater
HAI!!!

Posted 10 Years Ago


The human want and need to be coupled is the source of much joy and pain. I'm not a fan of a repetitive verse, but I can sense the emotions in this.

Posted 10 Years Ago


I like this poem, but a good way to take out the repeated words is to start the stanza with the words you want to repeat. Such as - The vain spirit ...... (here you go to a new line, and start your poetic verses). It will make people read your poem, instead of glancing over it. I had to stop myself from glancing, and I'm glad I did.

Posted 10 Years Ago


The vain spirit is gleaming with desire
The vain spirit refuse to douse the fire

Some very tight verse but yes perhaps just a little too heavy on the repeat. Loved the closing lines.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Like this, but I feel you have to be careful not to overdo repeats, use this way very sparsely !

Posted 10 Years Ago


a great job and I liked the vain spirit that refuses to put out the fire

Posted 10 Years Ago



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Added on December 7, 2013
Last Updated on December 7, 2013

Author

Latifa
Latifa

oran, oran, Algeria



About
"the cave you fear the enter, holds the treasure you seek" Joseph cambell this quote is my thriving recipe for dwelling in the enchanting castle of words, more..

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