All I've Ever Known

All I've Ever Known

A Poem by Carly Shaw

a poem i wrote in the heart of my depression. Things get ugly before they get beautiful it seems. Or something beautiful comes out of something ugly. You choose...


i cant speak for others

but i can for myself

why does my life feel like a living hell.

people judging people

jealousy turning to hate 

sometimes i just wish i could turn to the golden gates

and forget this life

and forget this time

and never regret ever being left behind

its not like anyone sticks around

its not like i even care to be found

family is what people call mine

but trust me i wont even waste the time

to compel you with my story

i wont make you feel sorry for me

so ill just say

the term family has never looked my way

if anything its just a term to play


i cant forgive but ill try to forget

the reason that i cant ever have a relationship

The surname of this group full of shame boils in my veins

it will always remain a part of me 

but i will never let it get the best of thee

because if you cant see,i am different

i just don't see why everything comes back to me

i was hurt by him

and forgotten by thee

and that wine over there makes her forget everything

there is to be a life for me 

its faraway 

i can almost taste it

ill have to move fast

i don't want to waste it

this poem is souly based on a life of a girl

who inside is a silver  pearl

but outside you can only see

the black dust 

and the fiery crust that she gives away

hopefully she'll become that pearl on the outside,

one day...

© 2012 Carly Shaw

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Added on November 14, 2012
Last Updated on November 26, 2012
Tags: depression, realtalk, reality, life, teens, poetry, slam, family, adventure, knowing, future, creative writing, poem