A Poem by Carol Cashes

I'm okay, just wondered how that camel felt when he realized it was a tiny, damn near weightless straw that broke its back....and would I see the damn thing coming in time to avoid it.




This last journey, this trail, an infinity loop

Damn!  This load’s heavy �" I feel shoulders droop

Mine, his and their cares now stacked on my back

That’s okay - I got this…I’ve never cracked.

Wait!  Something’s happened.  The load feels all wrong

I’m just tired, I’m fine, I know I’m strong

I always come through…I always see dawn

That’s my job, get it done, I carry on

But now, on my knees, I struggle to stand

I have to do this! My duty demands

Can’t fail, not an option, what would they do?

If I don’t keep going, I’ll be one, not two

And the others?  Who’ll help them?

Fear creeps in, limbs now numb

I’m gasping for air, But what’s that I see?

It floats down slowly, lands next to me

Thin like a needle, Oh, no! it can’t be!

A straw �" light as air! But enough to break me.




© 2019 Carol Cashes

Author's Note

Carol Cashes a muse is a little like an acid trip...perspectives get skewed...but somehow you understand it better....

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register


Totally agree with your Author's note and this great poem, you can withstand the world upon your shoulders for so long and just the tiniest thing can destroy the balance, good stuff,

Posted 3 Years Ago

I like the unorthodox approach for this poem

it really stands out

Posted 3 Years Ago

yes, that last straw...we can only carry so much weight on our shoulders....and sometimes taking on others' problems might be the good Samaritan thing to do ....but if we empathize too much and help too many at once.
we wind up on our knees...bursting at the seams.
cleverly written rant here, Carol.

Posted 3 Years Ago

A wonderfully jilting sense of weight... What breaks us... What can we accommodate... An infinite loop of shoulders dropped to bear what becomes the last straw...

Posted 3 Years Ago

Powerful stuff, heart wrenching realisations...

Posted 3 Years Ago

Yes, yes, yes. Miz Carol you are back-yay! You return with such emotional and eloquent reports from the battlefield- because it is that for you, unquestionably. You speak directly to us in language that resonates with us- the Warriors. Your life has been constant ‘duck and jab’- a prize-fighters’ lot all the way. The tone, style, rhyme and flow of this sounds like the knockout round for one who takes care of Everyone! The straws are the worse though so be on your ‘bestest ‘ guard against them my friend. The down time sneaks in a lethal uppercut if you let it. It stings like a bee. But your sweet vulnerability, loving heart, naked honesty, faith and selflessness will revive you before anybody or anything can ever count you out. Take good care of yourself my dear friend and know that I am always in your corner. Xo

Posted 3 Years Ago

Such a power piece. I relate to it on a personal level,
I think the secret is conditioning. Like training for a marathon dig deep and find that next gear to keep going.
if you come up empty hopefully someone you've been carrying with jump right in.

Posted 3 Years Ago

Full of bleary, strained diction as the protagonist struggles to stay afloat but then has to surrender to their own limitations. Nicely done in a weary voice.

Posted 3 Years Ago

usually wide awake by 2AM ... sigh! I quite fighting for sleep a long time ago Carol ... I just start me day .. so relatable ... that "...Something's happened. The load feels all wrong" is perfect ... when I get there I am ready and when I read it I am feeling so off balance ...
i think your poem is crafted in a common ground language but it is uniquely yours as well ... i like the positive spots throughout ..the i got this and i can do it and been here befores the protagonist works to talk him/her self into being strong and not giving up ...i think as human beings this lesson is one of the most important as it adds the dimension of Faith into the scheme of our lives ... in your closing i see the straw landed " to me" ..not on me ;) an interesting twist to the whole experience ;) great read for me ...memory working overtime as i read "The Last Straw" :) and here i am .... made it!

Posted 3 Years Ago

Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ma chère eeeeeeeee its so comforting ... your companionship :)))))))))))))))))).. read more
Cherrie Palmer

3 Years Ago

I must confess even though daddy loved Irish whiskey I'm a Tennessee bourbon girl myself.
Einstein Noodle

3 Years Ago

ahahaha nothing wrong with Southern Bourbon :)
I too am one that suffers from insomnia, so draining it is and your lines convey the sort of thing which constantly loops in your head when you can't sleep. There is no logic or perspective when you are in that place. Fortunately for me, the straw has yet to break this camel's back. Well conveyed. I am with you here Carol. Good to see you.


Posted 3 Years Ago

Chris Shaw

3 Years Ago

:)). You might be tired but your humour is still with you.
Carol Cashes

3 Years Ago

I've heard inmates say that being funny kept them from getting beat up...just honing my craft, just .. read more
Chris Shaw

3 Years Ago

I'm sure a sense of humour has saved the day many a time. Off now for breakfast. Good to chat.

First Page first
Previous Page prev
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


11 Reviews
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on March 3, 2019
Last Updated on March 3, 2019


Carol Cashes
Carol Cashes

Biloxi, MS

I'm very cynical, jaded, just this side of bitter and the only reason I haven't crossed that line is a good man loves me. I am extremely empathetic, but seldom sympathetic. I can be a ferociously lo.. more..


Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..