As The Crow Flies So Do I

As The Crow Flies So Do I

A Poem by Christine Anne Shaw
"

(missing my mum in a nursing home two hundred miles away)

"
if i curse in verse
would you find it 
out of order?
.
like the borders
of the counties separating
me from my mother?
.
another day, another day
passes and another
no hope for me or
my dearly loved mother
.
sitting in the same old chair
staring at four walls
no visitors allowed
it's the virus you see
two hundred miles away
might as well be three
.
come anyway she says
i don't care if i die
though then i have to explain
and that causes me pain
to tell her i could give
it to others or they could
give it to me
.
conversation on the phone
is stilted unless i do the
talking
.
we are walking on a path
to nowhere it seems
she visits me sometimes
but only in dreams
.
it's easier there, the way
she used to be, dealing with
a fragmented mind
old age is dreadfully unkind
the source of much misery
.
when will i see my mother?
when will i see her again?
maybe you won't
says that inner voice
nagging away, torturing me
maybe, just maybe
you have to accept
that as a reality

© 2020 Christine Anne Shaw


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Featured Review


... every single line well and truly understood and I am sure no one would argue.. these are among the most difficult of times and those fears you outline so eloquently, a global reality.. I wonder whether it makes it easier or worse for you, knowing that your Mum may not fully grasp the true seriousness of the present situation..

Stay safe,

Neville

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

Thank you Neville. That's the problem, she doesn't understand and that's why she can't fathom why I .. read more



Reviews

Chris, this is a very poignant poem, with a lot of desperation and struggle in it. But also love.Having a barrier there which prevents you from seeing your aging mother is a hardship on both of you. This is so true now as a result of Covid. Families are separated for months with only electronics to see them, hear their voices. It’s terribly frustrating . I can empathize completely. A poem with Unhappy feelings is always hard to read.very well written Chris

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

Thank you. I wanted to highlight the problem that many of us have in these dreadful times. A univers.. read more
Betty Hermelee

1 Month Ago

My pleasure!
This is such a sad poem and I'm sorry you have to be separated from your Mom. I really hope this all will end soon and we can get back to our lives. Talking on the phone I'm sure must be so hard for you. Thoughts and prayers to you!

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

Thank you Donna for your empathy. So much appreciated.

Chris
No, I fekn wouldn't Chris. Go on, shock the b****y s**t out of us 😀
Such a sad thought to pen, or even think. That confused minds are getting more so, at not being able to make head nor tail of what is going on, and therefore, their lack of memory becomes a double curse when they forget what's going on and have to live the retelling once more, leading to a spiral of confusion that seems to have no end.
Our Nic up here is hinting at hospital visits restarting and possible staggered visiting in care homes too.
I felt your pain at having to explain why you couldn't just come anyway, for fear of bringing it back with you.
You never do feel so dreadfully grown up, as the moment parent/ child role reverses.
Hoping you get to see her again soon Chris.

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

Thanks Lorry. Yes, so many are confused and the retelling over and over again is painful. Hope thing.. read more
Chris, this has been one of the saddest consequences of the worldwide virus. Here, our elderly are often the forgotten, the ones we store on the edge of town, visiting on holidays and when guilt or free time find us. Even those visits are now lost.

Your poem shows what I believe is probably a universal feeling of many in nursing homes. They'd rather see their loved ones and risk death than live so many days alone, sequestered within four silent walls. I suppose we will eventually have enough of this virus and how it limits our freedom, and we'll take chances because loving someone means more than thinking about them from a distance, whether one block or one hundred miles away. A well crafted timely poem that speaks to millions.

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

Thank goodness you have family and community who can help you and you have been tested. That was one.. read more
R.E. Ray

1 Month Ago

Thank you, Chris. I appreciate your kind words. I'm blessed to be relatively young (52) and health.. read more
Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

That's a good start, a good position to be in if you've contracted it. Take great care.
"she visits me sometimes, but only in dreams" this is painful. Dear Christine, this poem is loaded with longing and pain.. I hope this pandemic ends soon so you can see your mom. I hope she's safe and sound.. most importanly, happy.

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

Thank you dear Lale. There are so many who are experiencing similar at the moment. It is so sad for .. read more
Lale

1 Month Ago

You're right..
you make us feel and understand the torture it is to have a loved one in this situation and to not be able to spend time face to face with this person.
so damn sad.

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

A universal problem Jacob. So many are feeling what I am and there isn't an easy solution. Sad times.. read more
bad memories from this Chris
Very difficult times

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

They are bad times for so many Dave. Sadly this is a universal concern at the moment. Hoping it will.. read more
This one tags at my throat and I have no more comment

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

Thanks Cassie of the smiling face. I am speaking fot many here who are in the same rotten situation... read more

... every single line well and truly understood and I am sure no one would argue.. these are among the most difficult of times and those fears you outline so eloquently, a global reality.. I wonder whether it makes it easier or worse for you, knowing that your Mum may not fully grasp the true seriousness of the present situation..

Stay safe,

Neville

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Christine Anne Shaw

1 Month Ago

Thank you Neville. That's the problem, she doesn't understand and that's why she can't fathom why I .. read more

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Added on June 30, 2020
Last Updated on July 1, 2020

Author

Christine Anne Shaw
Christine Anne Shaw

Berkshire, United Kingdom



About
Have been at Writerscafe for a year now, so pleased I made the change to posting my work here. Have loved reading poetry all my life, but never wrote my first poem until I hit 40. I wish now that I.. more..

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