A Poem by alienated.aquarius

(3 micropoems)



My art is melted candle wax

Dripping over the mentality that

Everything hardens over time

And everything is temporary.

Self-doubt tastes like diesel

Write me a script for imposter syndrome

For all the ideas I forgot to flesh out

It’s funny, how before I was medicated

I could write when I was depressed

Now, not so much

And lately I’ve been writing too many things

I’ll never have the balls to say.


All of life is waiting

For the sun to rise and set

For names to pop up on screens

For the check to clear

For things to get better

For the pain to pass

For the hunger to subside

It may just be the meaning of life

Just waiting

For it to be over.




Carelessness will cost you

Maybe others too, if you’re unlucky.

But it’s not about luck,

Or fate or freewill

It’s about owning up to your fuckups

Don’t let your self-preservation make you petty

One of the first things we learn is to point fingers

Like the threefold path, when you do,

You have three fingers pointing back at you.

The lessons you must learn

Will only get louder

Until is they claim your life.

Karma is calling

If ignored, she will

Force you to atone.

Poetry chapbook 'Sonder' now available on Amazon!

© 2019 alienated.aquarius

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If there ever was a constant in everybody's life, it's Karma. Everyone has a fragile spot in their genetic makeup. Some are just lucky and it's so small that it can't rule their life; for others, it's so big and takes up so much of them they can't escape their glass shell without cracks or shattering. Then they are thought to be unbalanced. Medication can't fix everything all the time. But everyone has a niche. You just have to find it and stick with it. Life is never perfect, what it is, is a daily lesson. Responsibility to yourself should be priority; can't be responsible for someone else if you don't know what it is. I know what it's like to close yourself off to the world and have only the daily routine to call your life. It can make you want it to be over. As far as accountability, if you have a rope on responsibility and have broken out of the shell and know how to be and not afraid to be honest, accountability is a breeze.

I could relate to this very easily. You did a fine job pulling these thoughts together. Amazing.

Posted 3 Months Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


Nice job brilliant Aquarius! This is superb.

Posted 1 Week Ago

I like your metaphors. Nice writing, Catie!

Posted 1 Week Ago

i fell in love with this piece. please keep writing more. lovely work - cheyenne s garcia

Posted 1 Week Ago

self doubt does taste like diesel....

Posted 2 Months Ago

Love it!!!! Very well written!

Posted 2 Months Ago

Very good Katie. Raw and immediate. Many of us are fragile and we can feel separated and different. i can identify strongly with the last few lines of the first verse. I have bipolar myself. Although I don't suffer from bad depression I do get manic from time to time and my thoughts are all over the place. If you are interested some of my early poems like manicarus describes this.
All the best,

Posted 2 Months Ago

wow Aquarius this is powerful. I know what it's like to lose yourself when you get on meds. like some piece of self fades away. when i dealt with that it was like some connection to inside myself was cut. I can soooo relate to the waiting, this whole work reflects to me the progression of life and hopefully to a realization about how it's lived and what's important. really good write, ty =o)

Posted 2 Months Ago

We're all in this chaos together, but your poem captures perfectly the human struggle of facing so many challenges

Posted 3 Months Ago

So much to comment on, I'll take a shortcut & address my favorite, the middle one. It's refreshing for someone to have the guts to describe all the ways people are waiting to die (great choice of life details to show instead of tell) . . . I'll go a step further (which your poem implies) . . . some feel weak & ineffective becuz they can't get up the balls to just end it. Others kill themselves over a lifetime with bad choices. To me, this poem highlights the biggest conundrum of being human. We're a miserable lot, generally! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 3 Months Ago

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Catie, you crafted this poem beautifully. Your phrasing creates a rhythm that I can’t help but sway to. I’m in love with the first two stanzas for everything they are. And I’m in love with the line in the third stanza that reminds me, “it’s about owning up to your fuckups.” Thank you for the read request

Posted 3 Months Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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14 Reviews
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on October 10, 2019
Last Updated on October 10, 2019
Tags: poet, poetry, poem, mental health, depression, creativity, artist, inspiration, self harm, self love, self care, anxiety



Buffalo, NY

Hi! I'm Catie. i write things (poems, fiction, blogs/articles) and try to publish them. i love chasing waterfalls and sunsets. i was born at a very young age. i can pick things up with my toes. i'm ob.. more..


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