Padded Walls

Something different... no not about me :)

Wrap me up... strap me up

Throw away the key

Locked in a room, I lay to spoon

With a shadow of me

      Shut them up!!!

      Tell them to stop!!!

      These voices wont cease!

Rocking on the floor, feeling like a w***e

Thoughts unwind

Bite my tongue, just for fun

Where is my mind?

Pad these walls… ignore the calls

I must be crazy

Hear the cries… my soul lies

Visions hazy

       “Just do it

       kill yourself

       do the world a favor”

I cannot lie… the voice inside

Says take my life

So I jump to fly

I fall and cry

But cannot die

So wrap me up, strap me up

Throw away the key

It’s obvious this padded room

Is the end of me,

 

 

Author's Note

Read and review please :)

Reviews

[Maja]

Woah this one's actually pretty scary but I enjoyed reading it :D I especially love the third, fourth, and the last two lines, because it gave the feeling that there's no escape not just from the padded room, but from the condition itself. Great poem and I'm glad I read it :)

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Maja :) I am glad you liked it. I tried to do something a little different with this write and I am glad you as a reader enjoyed :) Thank you

[Thesecuts]

Oh my god. This is so perfect and so sad at the same time... I LOVED IT!

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much :) I am glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate your compliment :)

[Yanina McKnight]

This piece is very dramatic, the structure and rhythm of your ideas definitely emphasize your tone throughout the work. I can see strength intertwined with suffering, I feel as though the speaker feels as though their own pain is the only element keeping them alive. "I fall and cry/But cannot die" is the climax, or turning point of this specific moment in time. I love the intensity of this poem.
Thank you for writing!

-Yanina

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Yanina :) I am glad you enjoyed it... I tried to be creative and it seems so far it is liked :)

[Yanina McKnight]

You're welcome :) You don't ever have to try with creativity, you are blessed with talent!

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Yanina :) I appreciate your compliment :D

[Yanina McKnight]

I'm glad!!

[Ruth]

Sadly, a reality for some and yet, I do wonder on the labels society place on so called "madness". Deeply thought provoking :)

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Poppy... I was trying to see what I could come up with and see if I could be creative enough to make it interesting. I am glad you liked it :)

[emmajoy]

Believe me, having read this poem three times, it grabs mind and heart by the throat! Not only does the dark font and apparent switch of voices shouting and muttering let rip utter bewilderment and abject misery, it all ends with a comma .. abruptly.. as if.. a life is being, has been, stifled by utter chaos with nowhere to go.. to hide.. to rest .. to escape ..

Frightening words written brilliantly.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Emma :) I appreciate your feedback, compliments and review :) I tried to make it as erratic and kind of crazy as I could to fit the mind of the character. Glad you liked it :)

[Writer at last! Sky ~]

Either a kind of disease or a mental sickness to stop the life and push everyone away.
I like the flow of your lines. Good one Aaron!

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Skyfall... it's definitely a touchy topic and one that is extremely difficult to understand. People make careers trying to learn as much as they can about the mind and the way it works and it never ends. Appreciate your review :)

[Writer at last! Sky ~]

Yes, I agree with you Aaron people completely get carried away by life sometimes...Thanks!

[Matching Socks]

Mental illness is heartbreaking... Good poem.

[AaronFreitas]

It definitely is... it leaves a person powerless. Appreciate your review Ana and it's nice to see you :)

[marcus]

Ya, that's pretty good. I liked it! Good structure, and meaningful.

[AaronFreitas]

Thanks Marcus... I tried to keep it meaningful and creative :) Glad you liked it buddy

[Brinleigh Bailey]

Crazy how quickly loneliness can turn to insanity. However, I think you captured the process well, though I wouldn't know. Regarding the actual writing, I thought it flowed nicely and had a dark element which I enjoyed. Very well done.

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you Brinleigh :) The mind is a powerful things and I've seen others lose control of it and it's crazy to witness. Appreciate your review and I am glad you liked it :)

[Not here]

this was really deep and very emotional. good job :)

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much Dante... appreciate the feedback :)

[....................]

Photo, poem and format, all play an instrumental part in describing for us the broken mind - a person at the end of their rope. However, though you may not have intended this, I do see hope in the plea from one who KNOWS he has no where else to turn... this is a very creative write, my friend, and one that draws for us a stark picture of a mind in chaos... well-done!!

[AaronFreitas]

Thank you very much FT! I was saying in another response I've seen a guy talk in four different voices and it's as if they all have a voice and conversation through him out loud. I was standing there in aww trying to figure out what was going on haha... a week later I show up for work and the guy is back in a normal jail cell and smiling like it never happened... talking normal and it was just something else to witness. The mind is an extremely powerful thing... appreciate your review :)