Padded Walls

Padded Walls

A Poem by AaronFreitas
"

Something different... no not about me :)

"


Wrap me up... strap me up

Throw away the key


Locked in a room, I lay to spoon

With a shadow of me


      Shut them up!!!

      Tell them to stop!!!

      These voices wont cease!


Rocking on the floor, feeling like a w***e

Thoughts unwind


Bite my tongue, just for fun

Where is my mind?


Pad these walls ignore the calls

I must be crazy


Hear the cries my soul lies

Visions hazy


       “Just do it

       kill yourself

       do the world a favor”

I cannot lie the voice inside

Says take my life

So I jump to fly

I fall and cry

But cannot die

So wrap me up, strap me up

Throw away the key

It’s obvious this padded room

Is the end of me,

 

 

© 2015 AaronFreitas


Author's Note

AaronFreitas
Read and review please :)

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Featured Review

Woah this one's actually pretty scary but I enjoyed reading it :D I especially love the third, fourth, and the last two lines, because it gave the feeling that there's no escape not just from the padded room, but from the condition itself. Great poem and I'm glad I read it :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

Thank you Maja :) I am glad you liked it. I tried to do something a little different with this writ.. read more
This comment has been deleted by the website administrators.



Reviews

This is fun and interesting. And very scary what that person must face, own mind plotting against him. who wouldn't go crazy in that white padded walled room and nothing one can do. Amazing wording and flow.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

It is hard to imagine your own mind plotting against us... I mean getting sad is hard enough but ima.. read more
I don't understand the part where the person said:
"So I jump to fly
I fall and cry
But cannot die"

I"m pretty sure the person was going to do suicide. Or is it simply the person's imagination when he/she tried to kill itself.

I never understand the feeling of being driven by insanity but as I try to feel empathy to those people who have mental disabilities, I tried thinking of the cause, whether was it the surroundings, parents, peers, or the whole society itself. If we take away the cause then no one would have to suffer from it.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

So those words... picture a guy sitting on a bed in a straight jacket voices in his head telling him.. read more
kclyaine

8 Years Ago

Did she die? And are you a police? A doctor? Or a psycho therapist?
AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

Nope she lived... put in a suicide cell with a suicide vest on for 48 hours and back to her cell. I.. read more
I've always had such a love/hate relationship with mental instability.
For all it's torture, it gives abundant creative force.
A very interesting theme, your rhyming is on point and the structure really makes it an experience.
Nice work,
-VM

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

Thank you Vanesa :) I tried to give a good flow and rhyming scheme yet still make it erratic and ki.. read more
I don't usually read
pieces like this but I
have one that is scarier then this
a Asylum poem I don't write many
poems like that either but makes
me think of the Asylums
with people that were crazy or lost
their mind and
had a dramatic
stress break down,


Some where just kind
souls getting better and some where
not kind souls there's
good and bad in the world
I've seen and felt it from people someone
Without a sound mind has
demons and mentally insane and I mean someone
that would harm you not someone
that needs meds for depression there's a difference
In sad depression and dark demonic.


You were right on target with this
Piece seems like unsound minded soul
over thinking and thinking too much causes
depression and
us to go nuts
and traumatic stress breakdown too.


So I'm very careful
with my body and mind the mind brain
and heart and bones and muscles can be very fragile it is why we must
recharge no matter our age don't stress and worry
God made us to love when
we worry and have any negativity
or negative thinking it harms us
it's a toxic chemical like
cancer all of causes
cancer so many don't know that.


People can break their mind and brain
over thinking some
have been know to bust
a brain cell ya know
writers not taking a
break to me that's
what causes writers
block and them to hurt their
wrists over using things.



Thank you for sharing.

I had to take a peek and check it out.

God bless Benita

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

Thank you very much for your awesome review Benita :) I mentioned in a few other responses that I h.. read more
Benita-Staebell M - KindredPoet

8 Years Ago

You're welcome. :)
there was a time that I felt like this before I found my bf and now im happier but I still think about the times that I wanted to kill myself because I felt that no one would notice me missing. dark times. I hate thinking about it because when I do, I get worse and worse and it sucks big time. sorry for the super long review!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

I think it's completely normal to go through those dark times... everyone has their reasons and it s.. read more
Wow didn't think u thought that way 😢😢😢😭😭😭😭

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

It's not me... I was saying in other responses I had to watch someone in a straight jacket and padde.. read more
This is my favorite poem of yours!!
This really inspires me!
Keep it up!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

Thank you very much Emily :) That means a lot :D
Ahh... very Dark and yet breathtaking ... You know right now I'm wonder-struck... It's very Intense! I felt every single word. As usual, Thanks for sharing such an Awesome Poetry with us! I loved loved this ONE!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

Thank you Dreamer... I got to observe someone in this situation before and it was an intense situati.. read more
Destiny Dreamer

8 Years Ago

I loved it.. GREAT WORK!
AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

You are too kind my friend :)
That picture you've put there, it's quite creepy and striking and had me looking at it for a while. The poem was entertaining, I liked the structure and rhyming pattern, it was something different. Only you could add or take away a few words here and there to make it flow even better. Enjoyed this piece, it's even got an inviting title!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

Thank you very much... I tried to keep flow but also a little erratic to make it a little different... read more
Great use of rhyme and a very strong use of fear emotion to capture the reader. Was similar to reading a short horror story. One can feel the anguish and the fear, the wanting to find an escape from such a hell. Also great use of punctuation to make the reader 'hear' the person screaming the words "Shut them up," very effective in setting the mood and tone of your poem. Thank you for sharing this work of art, thought I must add I feel for anyone who has had to go through this, ...please keep writing!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

Thank you Nadia :) I have witnessed this and it's a total roller coaster... an 8 hour shift of watc.. read more
Nadia B.

8 Years Ago

...I'd suggest keeping a bottle of holy water nearby, also that must take some serious mental streng.. read more
AaronFreitas

8 Years Ago

Yeah it's definitely crazy... I always have a bottle of holy water :)

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3554 Views
108 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 6 Libraries
Added on May 28, 2015
Last Updated on May 28, 2015

Author

AaronFreitas
AaronFreitas

CA



About
I love to write, most my work tends to be on the darker side. I write from my heart and tend not to mess with it too much. I guess sometimes I write and post without focusing on what everyone else w.. more..

Writing
Reality Reality

A Poem by AaronFreitas



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