Padded Walls

Padded Walls

A Poem by AaronFreitas
"

Something different... no not about me :)

"


Wrap me up... strap me up

Throw away the key


Locked in a room, I lay to spoon

With a shadow of me


      Shut them up!!!

      Tell them to stop!!!

      These voices wont cease!


Rocking on the floor, feeling like a w***e

Thoughts unwind


Bite my tongue, just for fun

Where is my mind?


Pad these walls ignore the calls

I must be crazy


Hear the cries my soul lies

Visions hazy


       “Just do it

       kill yourself

       do the world a favor”

I cannot lie the voice inside

Says take my life

So I jump to fly

I fall and cry

But cannot die

So wrap me up, strap me up

Throw away the key

It’s obvious this padded room

Is the end of me,

 

 

© 2015 AaronFreitas


Author's Note

AaronFreitas
Read and review please :)

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Featured Review

Woah this one's actually pretty scary but I enjoyed reading it :D I especially love the third, fourth, and the last two lines, because it gave the feeling that there's no escape not just from the padded room, but from the condition itself. Great poem and I'm glad I read it :)

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

4 Years Ago

Thank you Maja :) I am glad you liked it. I tried to do something a little different with this writ.. read more
This comment has been deleted by the website administrators.



Reviews

This is a fascinating and intriguing write....being a former social worker and seeing people in padded rooms....it struck a chord! Your creativity astounds!

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

4 Years Ago

Thank you very much Jane :) Appreciate your feedback. I tried to make it as real as I could as mos.. read more
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Tee
Wow! I love the rhyming and flow of this write
You're an amazing poet!

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

4 Years Ago

Thank you very much Tee :) I haven't wrote anything since this one lol it ate up my creativity :)
Woah this one's actually pretty scary but I enjoyed reading it :D I especially love the third, fourth, and the last two lines, because it gave the feeling that there's no escape not just from the padded room, but from the condition itself. Great poem and I'm glad I read it :)

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

4 Years Ago

Thank you Maja :) I am glad you liked it. I tried to do something a little different with this writ.. read more
This comment has been deleted by the website administrators.
I like really like the rhyme scheme here, it matches what is happening in the poem perfectly, good one.

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

4 Years Ago

Thank you Sophia :) I tried to match the style with the tone of the write so I am glad you got the .. read more
Bravo! The only thing you left out was the banging your head on the wall, oops forget I said that, I know nothing, nothing! Many years ago as part of my studies I worked in a facility and from looking in the eyes of its patients you have an apt description of what appeared to be going on in their minds, cool write.

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

4 Years Ago

haha yeah didn't mention that but it is true :) I got to work in a jail and observe some of this be.. read more
I can see why you have so many views. This piece is emotional, it makes you think, yet it is in such a catchy song-like rhythm that I couldn't help but to read it as though it was one. Well done, my friend! :)

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

4 Years Ago

Thank you very much :) For some reason I like rhyming and when I write I think that way... I don't .. read more
A Lonely Girl

4 Years Ago

You are very welcome :)
Yes you got it a sermon! Suicide is never the answer we must restore faith and confidence in God and oneself and show they have worth as a human being as a friend neighbor and a lost sheep Jesus is seeking for and calling their name.We as a society should hear their cries for help before its to late.But we have become a self absorbing society and selfish God help us all.Life is precious and needs to be embraced and be grateful for what we have

BILL

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

4 Years Ago

Thank you very much Bill :)
W R Stowe

4 Years Ago

You're very welcome Aaron

Bill
This reminded me so much of My Chemical Romance, what with all of the craziness that takes place in this poem. I really like this, it has a legitimately dark, atmosphere, and really does seem like something that a psychotic person would write. There were quite a few golden lines in this that really made the idea of this being written by somebody insane all the more believable. First off, the line;

Locked in a room, I lay to spoon

With a shadow of me

I'm going to give you major points for that line, because that's just a generally creepy thing to say, and really makes itself at home in this poem. The next line;

Bite my tongue, just for fun

Where is my mind?

This line really manages to keep the momentum going. I can tell that you put a good deal of thought into this piece by how well thought out and somewhat clever these lines are. I really do think you couldn't have written this any better than you have. Fantastic, that's all I have to say! :)



Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

4 Years Ago

Thank you very much buddy for the awesome review! I tried to make it as erratic and crazy as how I .. read more
very powerful word tapestry...i do not believe that locking one up or strapping them down is a good solution but sometimes the break it affords us is needed...my heart goes out to you in hope your world begins to glow with laughter and love soon...

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

4 Years Ago

Thank you my friend. It is definitely hard to see someone in that situation... not fun and it's alm.. read more
jeannemarie coulter

4 Years Ago

you are welcome...jc
Sup bro, OK just brows through your profile to see were all this Aura is coming about, and you mentioned that this is the type of writing that you prefer so were good on that":-) although I choose not to write as dark as I can, I have no problem reading them. This is like a scene in a movie, very well scripted and full of raw pain and suffering, great piece
Buddy ! :-)

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

AaronFreitas

4 Years Ago

Thanks buddy... this one was something a little different but I tried to look at it from a different.. read more

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3388 Views
108 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 6 Libraries
Added on May 28, 2015
Last Updated on May 28, 2015

Author

AaronFreitas
AaronFreitas

CA



About
I love to write, most my work tends to be on the darker side. I write from my heart and tend not to mess with it too much. I guess sometimes I write and post without focusing on what everyone else w.. more..

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Reality Reality

A Poem by AaronFreitas



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