When We Lived Like Bandits

poetic translation of story shared with me from oldest son.

When We Lived Like Bandits

Rocky overhang

rivulets below-

Shadows dance

sing and laugh

adorning granite walls

 

Embers cool

darkness settles-

Hearts share

secrets and fears

echoing honest words

 

Morning light

descends hill-

Lives linked

in truth and jest

when we lived like bandits

Reviews

[FGFRANKLIN]

Well, it sounds like you made out like bandits as the scenery presented here is one of beauty. I haven't been camping in so long. I miss it. I went on a trip with my three brothers before one of them passed away. Just the four of us, a couple guitars, a case of beer, plenty of firewood and some fishing poles. We had a blast. This was a great write bringing back a precious memory to me. I enjoyed.

[willweb]

That was nice, like a warm poetic hike with scenery that is a vision of wonder and beauty. Nice one Carl.

[JD Major]

A remarkably beautiful write, Carl. Warm, rhythmic, captivating!

[Kelly Scheppers]

Hi Carl! Well, I must admit I'm not familiar with the expression, { ...like bandits }, but I truly love the caliber of your style. Your closing line that repeats the title...that's an art in itself, and not so simple to achieve. Makes me want to read more...

[John the Baptist]

Really liked the spare delivery and the imagery. Makes the bandit's life seem almost romantic. I wonder what your fellow Missourian Jesse James would have to say about it.

[carl]

Yeah, good question, his life has certainly been glamorized by Hollywood many times over, but doubt it was quite as romantic as portrayed in at least a few instances.

[W. Barrett Munn]

Carl,

I really like the construction of this piece with the assonance so prominent in stanza one, hang, dance, granite, and stanza two, ember, settle, echo, and the the alliteration in stanza three all combine to furnish a musicality that cuts against the non-structure of meter.
A pleasant lyrical trip.

Winston

[DIVYA]

"When we lived like bandits" ....I pictured friends in a beautiful hideaway, enjoying an evening, a night and then a dawn, together, sharing secrets and fears. Carefree days, stolen days. This is a poem that paints a picture in few words and I loved it.

[carl]

exactly. my two sons and a college buddy in the mountains of Kentucky or Tennessee - thanks for the read and encouragement.

[DIVYA]

It is such a pleasure!
Have a lovely day :)

[Soren]

I loved the staccato style of verse that lent itself to the snapshot like pictures reviving memories of such sights. The last line was a killer and had multiple meanings to me. Many of those experiences that I hold in my memories seemed as if I had stolen them at the time and certainly the origin of the word bandit meaning bandito that came from vulgar Latin meaning to proclaim is exactly what this poem does. It proclaims the beauty of this scene and the unity of two that "share secrets and fears echoing honest words"