Soul Session 2

Soul Session 2

A Poem by CRZ

Feel like I'm trapped within my own thoughts. My dreams and aspirations are opening these rusting shackles upon my inner being. But then these doubts and tribulations bring these new titanium chains, it smells fresh and even stronger now.
I know I'll break them soon to see another come soon. Well I hope I'll be different by then.
One corner is filled with light and the positives, the other one is dark and gloomy

    But I'm not in neither sides. Body is in the dead center. The physical is doing alright. 

It's the soul... you see the soul is a boomerang. Goes over there and makes its way back. 
See I'm just afraid that my boomerang will leave and never come back 
  

© 2013 CRZ


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An interesting write... I see this as a purging piece of prose that really shows your emotional depth and the honesty that you use to craft your observations. Being trapped within ones own thoughts...I've been there. In the end, I believe there is light and dark within us all, and as you put it, the "soul is a boomerang", that spins between both planes.

Only suggestions would possibly be on form and a little grammatical content. I think if you put this together in a few stanzas with a few shorter lines the impact would be more rich. You have a great conceptual mind, though...your art shines.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I liked this poem very much, Jason. It is very thought-provoking and you have invented an interesting format. Good one.

Posted 7 Years Ago


many poems,songs,plays have been based on this assumption
free spirit return to me

Posted 7 Years Ago


Intelligent. I now how you feel. Hoping forever that the future might be different sucks. But I love this poem.

Posted 7 Years Ago


love this. dreams and aspirations opening rusty shackles only to be replaced by titanium chains. I feel that way too at times.

Posted 7 Years Ago


written nicely. talk to oneself filled with hopelessness and positivity as well.

Posted 7 Years Ago


transference
transfiguration
physical and metaphysical
it's times like this you need a drink

Posted 7 Years Ago


I love this prose poem, the meandering of your emotions on the page and the soul as a boomerang. Love images.

Posted 7 Years Ago


The soul can indeed fly back and forth from there to here and back again. I have often wondered myself if one of those nights as I project out upon the astral if I will return. And yet your use of boomerang implies indeed you will for the boomerang never fail to return.

A couple grammatical tweaks perhaps and I would change the second soon in the following line perhaps to again. But simply because I tend to avoid repetition in this manner.
I know I'll break them soon to see another come soon

Posted 7 Years Ago


An interesting write. Thought provoking for sure. =)

Posted 7 Years Ago


Very deep piece. I love the ending, "It's the soul... you see the soul is a boomerang. Goes over there and makes its way back. See I'm just afraid that my boomerang will leave and never come back", because it's the fear a lot of people of...well people I know.
:) I like it! :D Keep writing!

Posted 7 Years Ago



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Added on July 31, 2013
Last Updated on July 31, 2013

Author

CRZ
CRZ

New York, NY



About
Poet & Artist Thou shall not rest until I make my whole fam rich more..

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A Poem by CRZ



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