infinite

infinite

A Poem by curiouslyinsane
"

I'm not sure, actually.

"
we were creatures of whimsy
dancing beneath the stars
the world passed us by
our minds alight with the sun

we were entwined
our universe bright and small
shining as a distant star
on the horizon

we lived alone
but never lonely
together in sentience
constantly yearning for the other

we reached for each other
i for you and you for me
and when our fingertips met
we became infinite

© 2012 curiouslyinsane


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It is a bit confusing in my untrained eye, I used to write like this...It comes in a rush and sounds so good when you put it down. It clearly needs work...In the first verse for instance...Dancing..alight with the sun...yet DEAD to the world...I think this has to be changed...I am NO expert...and I am only trying to help...

This review was written for a previous version of this writing

Posted 9 Years Ago



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1 Review
Added on July 1, 2012
Last Updated on July 1, 2012
Tags: poetry, poem, infinity, infinite, stars, abstract, love

Author

curiouslyinsane
curiouslyinsane

somewhere near SF, CA



About
'Ello, I'm Jordan. I'm fourteen, and I write and watch television and dream. My self-description skills are lacking. I like things made of wood and glass, classical music, tea, compliments, and lazy d.. more..

Writing