Drowning

Drowning

A Poem by Jenny-Jen-Jen
"

When falling for someone doesn't quite feel the way it should.

"

Drowning

Like an evening sunset,

A harmony of color is ablaze.

Our love is like embers of a fire,

Each spark, flying without delays.

With such carelessness,

No, we deserve no praise.

Moving faster than the rip tide,

With currents pulling us into the haze.

And I feel as if I’m drowning,

Lifeless, moving only how the water sways.

Tell me darling,

Where is the end of this maze?

I wish to find love,

Not just another phase.

© 2012 Jenny-Jen-Jen


Author's Note

Jenny-Jen-Jen
Getting a lot of inspiration for poetry lately. Critique and Review, welcomed with open arms. Thanks guys.

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Reviews

I really liked the way it flows, the length of each line and the rhythm it helps to create, well done.

Posted 12 Years Ago


that is beautiful..i really like the final line....nice work :)

Posted 12 Years Ago


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Ray
You have a talent... I think there's nothing I can say than what I've said in other reviews of your poetry, I never find anything else to thing other than your writing is excellent, I am becoming SO jealous of you, I wish I could write like that !

Posted 12 Years Ago


in relation to the mechanic I loved the rhyming scheme that was gentle, selective and not forced...now if a metre was there then even better..The message, the content is certainly probing. The question asked at the end written with much affection but a sense of resignation. Liked this.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Great write, I love your every line of this poem. With regards.

Posted 12 Years Ago


wow... what an amazing poem. Love the last line. Very pretty.

Posted 12 Years Ago


Excellent!

Posted 12 Years Ago


The questions of love. Only answered with time and luck. I like the description of the desire of love and wanting to know what direction the love is going. Thank you for a excellent poem.
Coyote

Posted 12 Years Ago


Emotional :) nice

Posted 12 Years Ago



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516 Views
12 Reviews
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Added on May 20, 2012
Last Updated on May 20, 2012
Tags: Romance, Love, Relationships, Drowning, Lust, False, Truth

Author

Jenny-Jen-Jen
Jenny-Jen-Jen

Mo-Town, NC



About
Death is Peaceful. Life is Harder. I base my writing upon what comes to mind, what I'm going through, and true feelings. I'm opinionated, and sometimes you'll see that shine through the cracks of m.. more..

Writing
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A Poem by Jenny-Jen-Jen



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