Drowning

Drowning

A Poem by Jenny-Jen-Jen
"

When falling for someone doesn't quite feel the way it should.

"

Drowning

Like an evening sunset,

A harmony of color is ablaze.

Our love is like embers of a fire,

Each spark, flying without delays.

With such carelessness,

No, we deserve no praise.

Moving faster than the rip tide,

With currents pulling us into the haze.

And I feel as if I’m drowning,

Lifeless, moving only how the water sways.

Tell me darling,

Where is the end of this maze?

I wish to find love,

Not just another phase.

© 2012 Jenny-Jen-Jen


Author's Note

Jenny-Jen-Jen
Getting a lot of inspiration for poetry lately. Critique and Review, welcomed with open arms. Thanks guys.

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Reviews

I really liked the way it flows, the length of each line and the rhythm it helps to create, well done.

Posted 8 Years Ago


that is beautiful..i really like the final line....nice work :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


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Ray
You have a talent... I think there's nothing I can say than what I've said in other reviews of your poetry, I never find anything else to thing other than your writing is excellent, I am becoming SO jealous of you, I wish I could write like that !

Posted 8 Years Ago


in relation to the mechanic I loved the rhyming scheme that was gentle, selective and not forced...now if a metre was there then even better..The message, the content is certainly probing. The question asked at the end written with much affection but a sense of resignation. Liked this.

Posted 8 Years Ago


Great write, I love your every line of this poem. With regards.

Posted 8 Years Ago


wow... what an amazing poem. Love the last line. Very pretty.

Posted 8 Years Ago


Excellent!

Posted 8 Years Ago


The questions of love. Only answered with time and luck. I like the description of the desire of love and wanting to know what direction the love is going. Thank you for a excellent poem.
Coyote

Posted 8 Years Ago


Emotional :) nice

Posted 8 Years Ago



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456 Views
12 Reviews
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Added on May 20, 2012
Last Updated on May 20, 2012
Tags: Romance, Love, Relationships, Drowning, Lust, False, Truth

Author

Jenny-Jen-Jen
Jenny-Jen-Jen

Mo-Town, NC



About
Death is Peaceful. Life is Harder. I base my writing upon what comes to mind, what I'm going through, and true feelings. I'm opinionated, and sometimes you'll see that shine through the cracks of m.. more..

Writing
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A Poem by Jenny-Jen-Jen



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