Flooding me in silence

a rap so rap it

the phantasmal darkness 

the veiled heart piece 

a masked man

with words no one understands

a shattered promise

to be honest 

a hypocritical promise

to me 

veins hollow 

pumping cold air

into the void it goes

the place no one knows

lying here in ambiguity 

lying here in faith

i lie here 

emotion surrounding me

no room in this hollow heart piece 

swallowed by infinite darkness

"a lack thereof "

 a wish for silence

swallowed no choice

no words just hollow voice

the voices surround me

these words confound me

a disconnect

a resonance in dissonance 

compounded 

in the noise of silence 

filled with these hollow voices 

and meaningless choices

i drag myself through this cold void

cold air pouring from the fracture 

flooding me in silence...

Author's Note

would love as much constructive criticism as possible please don't sugar coat

Reviews

[heylel]

I can really relate to this poem right now so it made me a little emotional when I read it, but I feel like that means you've written it well. I was going to quote my favourite part of the poem, but then I realised that I'd end up quoting the entire thing! Your words resonate with me and I'm sure many others, and the way you describe your feelings is amazing. For me, it's a struggle to put my own into words, so I'm always impressed and maybe a little envious when others can. Thank you for writing this. Thank you for sharing this. It always takes a little bit of the weight on my shoulders off when I know that someone understands what I'm going through, that someone's been there, and that I'm not alone. Thank you. I really needed to see this tonight.

[TheAimlessWanderer]

I AM SO GLAD THAT THIS HELPED YOU !! i will struggle to express this in words but your comment made my day and gave me such a feeling of fulfillment as a writer. that i could actually help someone by showing them they are not alone if you ever need someone to talk to feel free to message me anytime (:

[Tevin]

This was a good read, I love the rhymes and how I sort of could empathize and quickly resonate with your poem within the first few lines. It feels incomplete though

[Becca]

I really enjoyed this poem. As you described the darkness I felt as if I was in a very cold dark space. It was beautiful

[TheAimlessWanderer]

glad you liked it thank you for thinking it was beautiful (:

[Sarah]

Very descriptive. How the voices and words in your head, the darkness surrounding your body, completely and utterly floods you. Great representation of how depression feels. Well done.

[TheAimlessWanderer]

Thank you very much i am glad you liked it !

[Jester]

Very nice. I like the format of this as well. Very appealing to the eye. Thank you

[TheAimlessWanderer]

Thank you for reading it glad you enjoyed it !

[Ookpik]

I didnt know you wrote raps :)

[TheAimlessWanderer]

i have one other one on here it is called beyond my hollow soul but i rap all the time out loud and in my head helps deal with my flooding thoughts (:

[Ookpik]

I hear you, I found that rap helped with fluidity in my poetry quite a bit. People dont generally correlate rap to poetry but they are very nearly one in the same

[TheAimlessWanderer]

indeed i totally agree (: it was something i always did i used to be ashamed of it but it helps me cope with my thoughts and feelings so now i embrace it and plan to share a little on here (: