nothing lasts forever

nothing lasts forever

A Poem by daniel lee johnson
"

it took me three years to finish this poem. I hope it is enjoyable.

"

awake my child from the dreams of night
smile and dance to the morning light
sing aloud the song of today
but never forget it never can stay


but we all try to hold on so fast
and what was the first turned out to be last
and the tighter that we gripped
the more away from us it slipped


and water drips from our hands
and time flies away from us
no longer leaving any demands
leaving us to return to dust



nothing lasts forever(c)2015dlj

© 2015 daniel lee johnson


Author's Note

daniel lee johnson
greetings from a late Louisiana Saturday night.

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Featured Review

I like this poem, Daniel. I was intrigued when you described this poem as having taken three years to write. That's true dedication, my friend. Your rhyme scheme is very interesting-it goes AABB CCDD EFEF. The stylistic choice of changing the pattern in the last stanza was a creative one, and I think it works. You could get away with it, or you could change it to "and water drips from our hands/no longer leaving any demands/and time flies away from us/leaving us to return to dust." I like the second one because it fits into the original rhyme scheme, and every other line starts with "and," but I also like the original version because the first two lines start with "and", and changing the rhyme scheme shakes things up a bit. Whatever you do with the last stanza, this entire poem is beautiful. Thank you for sharing the excellent work! :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

daniel lee johnson

8 Years Ago

Thanks Lena. I have several poems from years gone by that are unfinished. I often work on them and m.. read more



Reviews

I like this poem, Daniel. I was intrigued when you described this poem as having taken three years to write. That's true dedication, my friend. Your rhyme scheme is very interesting-it goes AABB CCDD EFEF. The stylistic choice of changing the pattern in the last stanza was a creative one, and I think it works. You could get away with it, or you could change it to "and water drips from our hands/no longer leaving any demands/and time flies away from us/leaving us to return to dust." I like the second one because it fits into the original rhyme scheme, and every other line starts with "and," but I also like the original version because the first two lines start with "and", and changing the rhyme scheme shakes things up a bit. Whatever you do with the last stanza, this entire poem is beautiful. Thank you for sharing the excellent work! :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

daniel lee johnson

8 Years Ago

Thanks Lena. I have several poems from years gone by that are unfinished. I often work on them and m.. read more
I love the idea that nothing lasts, evens out the playing field, I think. or is it the promise of new adventures and the end of the days that teach me how to know pleasure and compare it to pain? rambling on again, I am...you made me think..

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

daniel lee johnson

8 Years Ago

Thanks and I am am glad it got you thinking
Such a great write and very true. I liked it.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

daniel lee johnson

8 Years Ago

Thanks so much Melinda !!!!
My mother used to say that as one got older time seemed to speed up. She was right, and this piece sums it up perfectly. Well done!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

daniel lee johnson

8 Years Ago

Yes and she was right. At 54 it is flying by so fast. Like a train that goes faster as it reaches or.. read more
the harder we try to hold on to life, the more it slips through our hands, minds and hearts...

i like it...and those lines starting with the conjunctions...very Beat-like.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

daniel lee johnson

8 Years Ago

Thanks and snaps fingers
Very good write
I enjoyed reading it


Posted 8 Years Ago


Zac

8 Years Ago

You are a very good poet
daniel lee johnson

8 Years Ago

Thanks man. Sometimes I think my poetry is all a bunch of crap though lol
Zac

8 Years Ago

Don't think that way,
And if you do, just strive to make it better.
Very nice write, completely enjoyed reading this!
You are absolutely correct when saying, nothing lasts forever!
Great flow and clear message!
Thanks for sharing and b-blessed!

Posted 8 Years Ago


daniel lee johnson

8 Years Ago

Thank you as always Jamestown and apologize it took so long to answer!!

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Added on April 10, 2015
Last Updated on April 16, 2015
Tags: poetry


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