Anthem of Ashes

Evil will not destroy us, our apathy towards it will

Anthem of Ashes

 

We drift beneath the water and we can hear the roar of thunder

But we are chained by our apathy

Burning banners rain down as Malevolence unleashes her hollow howl

And reveals her crimson claws

The innocent fall while the ignorant are all seduced by Revelry

Into our crypt we slowly crawl

Haunted heroes finally break, the wild child inside sinks into the grave

And yet here we remain, Kings and Queens of the Gray

 

We drift beneath the water and we can hear the roar of thunder

But we are chained by our apathy and have never heard of casualty

Wounded and petrified, swallowed whole by diabolic despondency

The forsaken are executed by Defeat

The vile hearted march on, decimation spreads like a deadly plague

Slowly through the hive of Society

This curse will draw our name unless we heed what the Oracles say

We must rise and eradicate or we’ll wither and desiccate

 

We drift beneath the water and we can hear the roar of thunder

But we are chained by our apathy and have never heard of casualty

Damnation sings the Anthem of Ashes

And yet here we still stand, crippled by the walls that have us confined

Author's Note

(sigh), I tried to keep the momentum flowing while writing this, but I personally think that near the end, I lost it. Anyway, I decided that I should try addressing a more serious issue for once with my writing. I know this is yet another dark song, but I can't seem to help that right now, because my mind only keeps coming up with lyrics for dark material right now for some reason, and I'm not going to try and force anything. So tell me what you think, as usual! :)

Reviews

[Nightfeather]

This is one of the best poems that i have ever read in my life. It is so powerful but yet it also embraces the elegance that it deserves thanks to the lay-out.

Good job :D

[DoormanDan]

Out of all the poems I've written, this one seems to be the one that I was the most wrong about, because I didn't like it very much when I first wrote it. Anyway, I'm glad you like this piece so much. Thanks for reviewing :)

[J Todd Underhill]

Dang this would make a great spoken word art piece! I would love it if you called our show at www.worldpoetryopenmic.net and shared it on some Friday night! excellently done!

[DoormanDan]

Thanks for the review, I'll check it out sometime. :)

[Amber Lily]

I HAVE RETURNED FROM THE DEPTHS OF COLLEGE TO REIVEW A CRAP TON OF WRITING!!!
It was super refreshing to read some more of your work Dan! I feel like everything you write is right up my ally and I can't help but love it. Whenever you come out with your first album I demand that you find me and tell me what it's called so I can buy it lol
There's a really cool message here that I picked up on. No matter how bad someone might want to change something we are always restricted by our government. Nothing is okay unless they say so. Even when the world is in ruin it would be hard for us everyday casual people to do something about it. Great work :)

[DoormanDan]

Welcome back from the depths of college Amber. Lol, don't worry, I'll let you know if I ever get into a band and if the band releases an album. This is probably the closest any of my poems have come to being political. You're spot on with the message, as always. Thanks for reviewing :)

[jeannemarie coulter]

But we are chained by our apathy

this line grabbed me and i fell into your word tapestry...well penned, dan, kudos to you n bows as well...

[DoormanDan]

I'm glad that this was to your liking, thanks, as always, for reviewing :)

[GreenEyedPoet]

Awesome write Dan, really liked the flow of it. And I liked how 'Kings and Queens of the Gray' sticks out, I feel like it pulls the reader into the piece. Nice job! :)

[DoormanDan]

I'm really glad you liked this. The funny thing about that line is that I was actually extremely close to taking it out because I thought it was one of the weakest lines I ever came up with, but I guess I was wrong :)

[GreenEyedPoet]

I guess you were. :P

[Robert]

You did a good job with this write and conveying the message presented in this piece. Well done.

[DoormanDan]

I'm glad that the message is clear in this piece, and I'm glad that you like this. thanks for reviewing :)

[Thatoetsile Simons Thup..]

You are really a great poet.
I've read all your poems and they are really great.

The words you highlighted are really a good quality.
Love the way you play with your fonts.

The way you use words and figure of speech are really nice.
It is the art of your words that make you such a great poet.

Keep doing good job.
KEEP WELL.

[DoormanDan]

Thank you so much for the compliments on my writing ability. I'm really glad that you like my material :)

[wordman]

i think it ended very well,sometimes we think it`s wrong but turns out to fit right in,great poom,loved the name

[DoormanDan]

Thanks for the review. In my opinion, doing nothing at all about something can almost be as bad as committing the crime itself, if not as bad. I'm glad you liked this :)

[wordman]

you`re welcome dan

[Valentine]

Kings and queens of the grey. For a while I thought you were writing about the Blue and Grey soldiers of one of our past wars. I love your flow and word usage. Valentine

[DoormanDan]

I can see how you would think that. That is most certainly a way that this can be seen. After all, that's what songs and poems are meant to be in my eyes; open to interpretation. Thanks for reviewing this :)

[Ashish Hegde]

I loved the flow and the personification of malevolence. "Kings and queens of the gray" struck a chord.
This was a wonderful read. Not always you get gems like these.
I am new here, could you review my only story so far and give me tips on how to keep the readers intrigued?

[DoormanDan]

Thank you so much for the review! The funny thing about that line is that I actually considered changing it because it was a weak line to me. Just goes to show that sometimes that writer's can be wrong about things, doesn't it? Anyway, thanks for reviewing this, and I'll check out your story when I get the chance :)

[Ashish Hegde]

Yup, writers can be wrong about things. Writings often tend to go beyond the author's intentions. In the end, the reader has his own opinions which may or may not agree with the author and this is a good thing. Because if a reader feels nothing after the act of reading then the writer has failed.

[DoormanDan]

True words, true words indeed :)