It's ringing in my head

Songfic for Ring Ding Dong that came out less than a month ago and is already #3 most played (about 350+ plays with restraints). Rated 13+ for language

 

It’s ringing in my head

You’re like a butterfly…So weak, so gentle, I’ve fallen...

 

It is spring, a fresh yet cozy kind of spring. It is the kind that is pleasantly cool with an occasional warm wind. Just as I like it. The school windows open to let the new wave of warmth sweep through. My hand covers a thoughtful mouth, leaning against the slightly vandalized desk. Buzzing thoughts fuzz my mind. Then a flash of purple catches my eye. I glance up in time to see a small butterfly flickering in. Not only is it an eye-catching violet, but it also seems to have a purpose. What an intriguing creature. It flutters around the room before settling on that desk. And I notice for the second time. She is absent.

~~~ ~~~~~~

Yeah, you could say I’ve always been aware of her. I mean, who wouldn’t? She was the class rep, the “good girl”. The straight A+ student. Her looks weren’t bad either. Her black hair flowed gracefully past her shoulders. I remember once noticing that her eyes changed to black-purple in the sunlight.

Then there was me. I was the loner, the stand-offish figure that you never knew about until I spoke. My hair was a dark red falling slightly past my pierced ears. I was the one who pulled C’s without much effort. I could’ve gotten A’s if I wanted to, but I didn’t. I was just lazy. We were different already.

One thing that I never understood, though, was that why she would act the way she did in front of other people. Keen observation gave me the ability to see through false images and fake smiles. And I saw through hers every day.

I don’t understand how you caught the reputation syndrome.

As I watched her, surrounded by giggling girls, I cringed a little at that strained smile. That unnatural shape her lips formed. It looked painful to make too.

It’s okay if you sometimes break away from that image. Break out…

Once, while watching her “laughing” with some other girls, I screamed at her in my mind to let go of that image. I stopped. My thoughts surprised me more than it should. “Why am I like this?” I muttered.

Later on that day, I was strolling around the school grounds to kill some time when the sound of a girl’s muffled crying reached me. I hated it when girls cried, but this time, for some reason, I felt as if I was needed.

Rounding a corner, I found her kneeling on the ground, face in her hands. A phone lay a few feet away. Her entire body shook with the effort to keep silent.

I leaned against the wall in front of her. “What are you crying about?” I said with as little annoyance as possible. But I couldn’t stop the edge that crept in.

Her head jerked up and her eyes were scared for a moment. Then that fake smile appeared again. “It’s nothing. I’m fine.” She murmured, wiping away her tears.

“Fine my a*s,” I scoffed, crossing my arms. I thought I hit a nerve.

I did. “It’s none of your business, you b*****d!” she burst out. It had the opposite effect on me than she possibly intended. I thought this statement amusing since she abandoned her reputation so quickly. This just proved to me how little faith she had in that image.

“Alright then. What is making you so upset?”

“My boyfriend abuses me. He treats me like crap and says horrible things about me. He just broke up with me after two months.”

“And?”

Angry tears started flowing down her cheeks again. “My friends don’t like me. They only are nice to me because I get good grades.”

(So she did know, I thought privately.)

“My parents are fighting again over some stupid issues that don’t mean anything!”

I lit a cigarette, just to annoy her. Breathing in a little, I release the cloud through my lips to the sky. “So, what is your problem?”

“I…I…” She fought for words. “I’m…I’m just so damn lonely!”

My mind stopped. At that moment, I forgot all previous objections towards this girl. No, she wasn’t the class rep anymore. Not the straight A’s girl. Just a vulnerable teenage girl who just confessed to loneliness. Something that I was never able to do. I suddenly felt very confused. My heart thumped heavily in my chest and my face suddenly felt warm. And, somewhere in the back of my mind, a ringing chimed.

Ring ding dong.

 

The next day during lunch, I went up to the rooftop. It was usually my private place to just relax in the open air. Only, that day, it wasn’t so private.

“What the hell are you doing here?” I yelled before I could stop myself. Glancing up, she beckoned me over. Cautiously, I crouched near her. She handed me a small box that produced a questioning look in return.

“I bothered you with my problems yesterday,” she said nervously. “So I wanted to thank you for putting up with me.”

Putting up with her? I thought. I just stood there like an idiot and said something stupid like ‘I can be your friend.’ I have no idea what the hell is my problem. I remembered the confusing feelings that rose in me. I shook them away.

I opened it. It was a cookie. With M&Ms. With a reassuring nod from her, I hesitantly took a bite. Almost instantly, it was gone. “Man, that was really good,” I said surprised.

“Really?” a wide smile drew her lips up. This time, it was real. “That’s great!”

I glanced away, feeling the warmth rising in my chest again.

“Hmmm? What’s wrong?” she asked, trying to meet my eyes.

Straightening and turning my back to her, I scratched the back of my head, flushing a little. “Honestly, I’m nervous as to how you see me.” I hastily stuffed my hands into my pockets and said, with my voice as low as I could, “I hope that you might, you just might have a good impression of me.”

Unfortunately, she heard the last part. “It wasn’t the best, but it is still good enough for me.” She smiled, standing. “After all, you’re my first friend since I moved here. I can’t ask for anything more than that.”

Everything that had happened was new to me. For some reason the word “friend” made me happy yet also a little disappointed. Disappointed with what I didn’t know.

Sitting on the ground, I pulled out a cigarette and, just as I was about to light it, she playfully scolded me. “Smoking isn’t good for you.”

 “Look,” I told her. I leaned back and gazed up into her downcast eyes. The familiar taste of the cigarette is bitter.“I may not be attractive, nice or anything like that, but,” I grinned widely with the soft white cylinder between my teeth. “I am a decent bad boy.” She chuckled. It was a sweet sound.

“So, Ms. Class Rep—”

“Please don’t call me that,” she cut in, wincing a little. “Pick something new.”

I thought about it and chuckled lightly. “I’ll call you butterfly.”

She tried hard to hide that smile. “Fine by me.” She couldn’t help the happiness from slipping into her voice.

 

And, just like that, time passed between us. I tried my best to help her abandon her image. It was hard at first, but it became easier and she eventually threw the mask away. It was inevitable that she would lose her previous “friends”. However, she gained true friends faster than I imagined. Along with her new friends, new admirers pursued her, though, for some unspoken reason, she always turned them down.

I had always been a loner so believed it would stay that way. But, being with her cured me of this. I found new friends where I believed there were none.

She felt a little indebted to me so she helped me in studies, ignoring my protests. At first I resented it, but I found spending time with her was important so I acquiesced.

“Wow! You got the highest grade in English!” She ran over and held me tight. She always had an unknown but sweet scent about her. Her hair was surprisingly soft. “Did studying help?” After saying that, she flashed me a proud grin. I found over time that her smile meant more to me than anything else.

“D****t, your smile should be illegal,” I muttered, pushing her away a little. I hope that my words covered the breathlessness that had overtaken my body moments before.

Baby, you stop my breath. So pretty I can’t stand it.

The days passed like seconds and I could never get enough. Enough of her and our time together. Every time she flashed her shy yet gentle smile, I felt as if there was nothing wrong in the world. I don’t know when it happened, but she had really blossomed from a tiny chrysalis, damaged by loneliness, to a young butterfly.

As the days go by, the idea that I can’t escape you gets driven in further.

Eventually, I found a name for the feeling that had been so new to me. It shocked me how simple it was and yet it described everything that was wrong with me. The embarrassing blushes, the sudden incoherencies, the shortness of breath. Just one word. Love.

Though unfamiliar to the area, I knew that it was best to confess to the other. And, hopefully, they’ll reciprocate. My only problem was how to do it. From past experiences with girls confessing to me, I knew the general idea on what to say. But the way to say it and how I should compose myself were things that plagued my mind for a while. In the end, I forcefully confessed to her because I didn’t want to confess like those girls that I ended up rejecting.

Yesterday, catching her alone, I grabbed her wrist tightly. “I like you, butterfly,” I said, meeting her eyes strongly. “Go out with me.”

Her surprised eyes widened then quickly adverted to the side.

I wasn’t satisfied. “Don’t turn away.” I growled into her ear. “Choose me. Don’t run away. You have to take responsibility for this fool that’s fallen for you.”

Suddenly, she pulled her hand from my grasp.

“He—” I was about to say something, but the words were lost when I saw those terrified eyes and flowing tears. My hand fell limply down against my side as I watched her. Without a word, she turned and ran away. And I didn’t follow. I couldn’t even if I wanted to. Rejection stabbed me through the heart before I could even comprehend it.

“I’ve fallen,” my heart cries softly, “so why are you treating me like this? Don’t run away. Why not try trusting me, my lady?”

“Wow,” I laughed at myself, though I found nothing humorous about the situation. “I really failed.” Delayed tears slipped down my face. My weak smile slipped off like a smudge on a window against the fury of the storm “But, god-d****t, I still love her …too much…” For the first time, I felt the pain of rejection. So this was the pain of unrequited love…

I can’t help these feelings but I can’t turn away…

~~~ ~~~ ~~~

Ring ding dong~

The bell snaps me of my musings. I wonder how much I had missed. Whatever, I already know everything. Throwing my bag over my shoulder, habit pushes my feet up the stairs. I light a cigarette as I push open the heavy door. Even though I already know she is there, my heart leaps joyously at the sight of her.

She first stood her back to me, long hair unbound as it should be. Her thigh-length skirt ripples a little in the breeze. Her head is tilted up as if she is thinking deeply about something. As I walk towards her, I loosen my tie. I’ve always hated the required tie—it felt like a collar that chained me to the school.

“So, Ms. Perfect skipped class,” I say, amused. “This is unusual, butterfly.”

She chuckles a little. When she turns around, her eyes are gentle. “I had a reason.”

“Let’s hear it,” I reply indulgently.

Her words are chosen carefully, “I want to…apologize. For what happened yesterday...”

I wait. I can wait all day if I have to. My body feels considerably lighter.

“When you told me, I was happy, inexpressibly happy that you loved me. But I remembered my previous boyfriend and how everything went wrong with him. I don’t know why I pulled away and ran, but my mind and my heart fought against each other. My mind told me that I should save myself from the pain, but my heart convinced me that you would never do anything to hurt me…”

I immediately regret the way I chose to confess to her. I salvaged her bad memories that I tried so hard to sink. I was such an idiot, such a fool. Love had made a fool of me. “You still haven’t given me an answer,” I answer instead quietly, looking down at her face.

For a very, very long moment, no words are born on her lips.

 “Complicated girl,” I whisper. “I might go crazy. Please don’t respond with a no.”

“But you must hate me,” she murmurs. “After I caused you pain...”

I stare at her incredulously. “Silly girl,” I shake my head in bewilderment. “You’re my miracle. My only butterfly. If I could only have you, I don’t need anything else.”

For the first time today, she meets my eyes. Her deep purple-black eyes wander over my face with a mixture of feelings. I open my arms and she runs into my waiting arms.

I’ve never held anything this tightly. I wanted to hold her tight and never let her go. Her embrace is just as passionate. Tears slip down her face into my shirt. The thought “damn, my sister is gonna kill me (for getting my shirt dirty)” very briefly crossed my mind. But right now, I really could care less.

I pulled away a little and held her cheek in my hand, hungry eyes soaking in every detail. “Don’t worry anymore. You only have to trust me. I’m really digging you. And, even if a herd of wild stallions tried, I can’t let you go.”

Her laugh is clear and, for once, real. I wanted to listen to it for eternity. “Just shut up and hold me.” she chuckles through more tears.

“Do you even need to ask?” As she holds me, I whisper so softly that I think she couldn’t hear. “I can hear it. It’s ringing in my head. My heart is calling.”

Glancing up, I briefly notice the violet butterfly flying high towards the heavens, clear chimes ringing. If it could smile, I think it would beam upon the two of us, sprouting our own wings against the painted sky.

Ring ding dong (ring ding dong)

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

I do not own the italisized lyrics nor SHINee (my they really grew up, didn't they?).
Original song: Ring ding dong (the title still cracks me up XD)
Artist: SHINee
Please make suggestions. :D

Reviews

[Jasminekay]

Nice story. I appreciate you entering this into my contest. It is well written and fits the crush prompt perfectly. I like that you used a guys POV. And I think this may turn out one of my favorite entries. I very much enjoy reading this.

[Madds]

nice... is it written in a guy's POV?

[Revolutionary]

I agree with Hisou I find your creativity with this song interesting.You have your own style.No one else in here writes a story like you do

[Hisou_Tenshi]

Meow~~ I love Ring Ding Dong. It was the first song I liked from K-Pop. You wrote a very good story for the lyrics. It's very pretty. Interesting thoughts from the main character. I thought that perhaps there was something a bit...familiar about this. It makes me wonder if someone will ever look at me that way. Very great story.

[WriterMe]

I... Um... Wow. I dont what to say. That piece really touched my heart. But what captivated me the most was the simple story line but such detailed emotions. It was truly a magnificent piece.
The comparison to the butterfly, the small details which inevitably give such a warm touch to the story- all this was really done in an exquisite manner. I never wanted it to end and at the same time, I wanted to know what happened in the end.
But I still cant get over how you managed to use such a simple story line and turn it into something so heart felt. This reminds me of an anime though. But in any case I really liked it. I hope to read more from you =]
Oh and no suggestions here. Still in awe, you see =]

---Niki

[Laura Sparkle]

Okay the way you have written this story just kept me reading. Even now that it's over, I want more and more. The story ironically fits with my current life, and it just made the story much more fascinating. Great piece! Bravo!

[~AmateurWriter]

The main character is a guy, right? just want to clear that up.
But I'd like to tell you that you have got talent and that this story was truly great :) it kept me wanting more and not wanting to stop reading. It was very original and a great love story. I also love how the song lyrics are incorporated in the story. Very well written :D

[Zak]

This piece is like no other that I have seen before. I mean, just the character you create in here is...deep. And you chose the perfect perspective to show us that, as well.
I'm left wondering: is the main character a guy or a girl? You might want to throw one or two confirmations in there.

Awesome!

Zak

[Jules]

i dont need to make suggestions it was great. it was in an unusual perspective but it worked and i really enjoyed it :D good work. jules x

[Lucia]

ahhh!!! I totally Love it! Great interpretation of the song.
This was soo incredible...I just kept reading...I couldn't turn
away from the scene. I don't think I even blinked.
Great job! Love the story and Shinee!!! =]