A Raven Of Hope

  

Misfit shadows lay alone

In shallow graves

Awaiting …

Wanting …

Needing …

Someone to bring life

To their paper-thin emotions.

 

The fog rolls in

In the nick of time

To make the illusion

Of happiness…

Support…

And love…

Of their faceless souls

That mirror depression.

 

Finally relief arrives

In the form of the undertaker

Not what they asked for

But what they received

Unusual light…

Flickering flame...

Hidden emotions…

As the dirt begins

To seal their fate.

 

A last comes the raven

In the knick of time

Whisking them away

On the wings of forever

Towards a blue sky.

 

Reviews

[Lyrical Love]

This took my breath away...
I am awed at the voice you speak in for this piece.
This is an awesome well worded write.
The fog rolls in
In the nick of time
To make the illusion
Of happiness�
Support�
And love�
Of their faceless souls
That mirror depression.
~~~~~I have to read more from you.
This spoke volumes...loudly.
This also speaks sadly for my three friends(not at the same time)
that thought nobody heard them(those paper thin emotions)...
they took their lives thinking that
life would be better for them
when the raven whisked them away into the
blues forever. From now on when I see the RAVENS
I will think of them and you.

[R. Gene MacDonald]

Nice piece my friend, I like the idea of the thoughts one might have right before heading off into the forever unkown. That is such a vast concept, and one I really think touches places in our minds we might not know are there.

[Sheila Kline]

Dale, this is a most unusual write, very deep, and that which I would take could be interpreted in different ways...as Life Without The Sun...complex, intense.
This speaks of death, without hope, and then they receive relief, but it is in the form of shadows, the raven indicates death.
What is interesting is that you speak of emotions...not of a "whole" person. I interpret that you are writing of one who has lost hope, given up.......not death of the body!
Excellent write, and it has touched me!
Sheila

[StrawberryDream]

Oh wow, its so easy to be whisked away in your world of words.
I adored it... And shall have to read it again and again. :)

[Belinda Rice]

This right here is another great write I love these parts cause it reminds me of me


The fog rolls in
In the nick of time
To make the illusion
Of happiness�
Support�
And love�
Of their faceless souls
That mirror depression.

Finally relief arrives
In the form of the undertaker
Not what they asked for
But what they received
Unusual light�
Flickering flame...
Hidden emotions�
As the dirt begins
To seal their fate.

A last comes the raven
In the knick of time
Whisking them away
On the wings of forever
Towards a blue sky.

We all some times get depressed But we have the chance to bring our self back together again..You always seem to have something in your writing that I can truly relate to thank you for sharing this with me I am surly going to give you a high rate on this one miss ya all on here.I hope to see a lot more....

[Haruki]

Excellent composition! Perfect continuum of metaphore and emotion. Well done.

[Erotic Goddess]

Wow, the mood that you created in this was thick with darkness and sadness, almost a true hopelessness, before the clouds part and they receive their final reprieve... I loved it, very mood and wonderful.

xxoxx,
Stephanie

One thing: A(t) last comes the raven

[ape domenigoni]

Misfit shadows lay alone

In shallow graves

Awaiting �

Wanting �

Needing �

Someone to bring life

To their paper-thin emotions

I love this part! Great poem, very creative....keep up the good work.

[Robert Luna]

Mmmm. The sweet story of the raven collecting all misplaced souls to fairy them to the other side of forever. Giving a much needed peace and comfort to all those whom seem lost and don't know their way home. I love this tale and I think you shows such a perfect capturing of it and the way my imagination has played it out a thousand times before.

Great JoB!!!!!!

[SM Davis]

Wow, I just gave a review to someone who wrote something very similar to this. I get the overwhelming sense that this is speaking of suicide.

A last comes the raven
In the knick of time
Whisking them away
On the wings of forever
Towards a blue sky.

If I have assumed correctly, I have to say that I think you've hit the nail on the head. I believe that suicide is not the end, only a huge jump start into another beginning.