breaking dawn

breaking dawn

A Poem by deathcabxcutiex
"

inspired by my newest addiction

"

first time i saw you
  i had a fever-
as good as it gets


shortness of breath
with spreading pink
distract,
i can't think

i'm losing my strength
feeling weak in your sight
giving in, i won't gain to fight


i'm taking it slow,
stoking my flame
shovelling the coals
of your game

and just in time
in the right place
suddenly i will play nice

but i won't soothe your pain
i won't ease your strain
you'll be waiting in vain
i've got nothing for you to
gain.

© 2009 deathcabxcutiex


Author's Note

deathcabxcutiex
photo from SS.

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Featured Review

Really good stuff here. The first three lines were fantastic! They made me want to stay home from work/school and eat chicken soup with 7-Up. Or tea. Or Gatorade. Ah, sweet hydration! Staying home sick is always a great chance to catch up on TV or unwatched DVDs. I digress... The poem is awesome. Definitely keep up the good work!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Your poem has a really good flow. The format is interesting, but I think that is part of what makes your poem good. I really liked it, it spoke to me.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

this was amazing!
I really liked this piece:)
your poetry is worth reading
-arabella

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

very nice write. i really enjoyed the first few lines were chopped and a short though showing the inability for you to think straight. it flowed well and really carried the reader along throughout the work.

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

i enjoyed this. yaaay i'm back on twc and so are you weee haha. newest addiction?

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Really good stuff here. The first three lines were fantastic! They made me want to stay home from work/school and eat chicken soup with 7-Up. Or tea. Or Gatorade. Ah, sweet hydration! Staying home sick is always a great chance to catch up on TV or unwatched DVDs. I digress... The poem is awesome. Definitely keep up the good work!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on January 16, 2009
Last Updated on January 18, 2009

Author

deathcabxcutiex
deathcabxcutiex

NJ



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I'm impossible to forget, but I'm hard to remember. more..

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