Desolation

Desolation

A Poem by Devanshu Rajput
"

Life of a desolate. Let me make this clear:- The poem does not convey my feelings. It is just about someone who is a victim of depression, that's all!

"

I am sad and also sometimes glad,

Over the life to me bestowed.

Thinking about it makes me mad,

I should be striding on which road?

*

This life is brief and I am in grief,

I now hope for a ray of light.

Here, my life is like a fallen leaf

I wander like a string-less kite.

*

Even the satanic sky asks why,

 This cold world here is cruel to me,

 Rather than to live, I long to die,

Perhaps that way I can be free.

© 2015 Devanshu Rajput


Author's Note

Devanshu Rajput
The poem adheres a strict syllable count of :- 9,8,9,8. And, rhyme scheme is also very strict. It is one of the toughest poem by me.

The poem is not about me, it is what I got in my mind, and then I let it flow in words. I am very positive by the way.

As always, the doors for critics are always welcome. Be harsh and strict while reviewing. I want to make this good.

I thank Sir Tate and Perkele.7885, for there kindness.

Thanks for stopping by and sparing time upon my work. Reading it is as same as honoring my efforts.

I firstly had named it "Introvert" but changed it and put "Pessimist". but soon after I again changed it to "Desolation" as many reviewers told me that, introversion and pessimism are different from depression. Thanks to those reviewers.

Image source:- Google

Devanshu

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Featured Review

I wander like a stringless kite.
This can happen on more occasions than one.
As soon as I read this line, I thought that as a dreamer I can relate to it.
Just a thought.

Your poem is amazing. The rhyme scheme was good too.
The ideas were expressed brilliantly.
You are very cheerful and that's why its a pleasant surprise how you carved out a poem from the view point of a loner with such perfection!
Kudos!

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Devanshu Rajput

7 Years Ago

Thanks for the beautiful review. I'm glad you liked it.

Devanshu
This comment has been deleted by the website administrators.



Reviews

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alf
Hi Devanshu. This is technically superb!!! There is an after taste of sorrow that lingers after the words have been read, the kind of emotion you get when you are down. A great effort!! alf

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

alf

7 Years Ago

Every new form we attempt is hard. When you look back in a month or so, you will wonder why you stre.. read more
Devanshu Rajput

7 Years Ago

After writing this, I had gone to have a look of my early pieces. There has been a sea change in my .. read more
alf

7 Years Ago

So very true!!!
An interesting read, Devanshu! Nice use of metre and rhyme
Now, even the sky to me asks why,.... I like this line. It feels magnanimous with a tinge of melancholy.

PS: Introvertism does not always reflect depression.

Posted 7 Years Ago


Devanshu Rajput

7 Years Ago

Ya, you are right. I think I should re-name it. Thanks for your advice and compliments.

read more
Sindu

7 Years Ago

may be the description too. you're welcome
I think it reflects reality very well. Nice job.

Posted 7 Years Ago


Devanshu Rajput

7 Years Ago

I am glad you liked it.

Devanshu
Here, my life is like a fallen leaf
I wander like a string less kite....not exactly depression but these thoughts may wander in any mind in grief....you have done it beautifully...:))

Posted 7 Years Ago


You schemed the rhyme so well. :)
a flow of sad tale!

Posted 7 Years Ago


Devanshu Rajput

7 Years Ago

Thanks for the compliment.

Devanshu
Beautiful...the rhyme and syllable count was perfect...
and beautiful use of words
Good job!
Maumil

Posted 7 Years Ago


Devanshu Rajput

7 Years Ago

I am glad you found them to be perfect. Thanks for reading and commenting.

Devanshu
Excellent!!!
so much strictness.......lol....
thoughtful and profound.......
i loved it!!!
:)

Posted 7 Years Ago


Devanshu Rajput

7 Years Ago

I am thankful of yours. I am glad you liked it.

Devanshu
Pushkar Prabhat

7 Years Ago

you are welcome!!! :) :)

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Added on May 10, 2015
Last Updated on May 13, 2015

Author

Devanshu Rajput
Devanshu Rajput

India



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Dear visitor, The above graphic is message from the very core of my heart. This is indeed my abode. It has been a very long time that I am here on this site. To be honest, this site, in my .. more..

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