Let Me Go

A nightingale, in its golden cage,

I looked beyond the window pane.

The bucolic view, the peaceful plane.

I just wanted to scream, in a rebellious rage.

Pass me a mic, give me a stage.

 

The sweet summer air of the forlorn dusk

The flowers in full bloom, oh the pungent musk.

But the stillness of this nirvana, will drive me insane

I want a dance, I want a rave, the music evoking in my veins.

 

The golden sunset spill on a dimming blue canvas

A splash of rose, a touch of crème.

Dessert it served for the human eye’s dream.

But where is the eruption of musical bliss,

And the crowd dancing euphorically in a chaotic remiss

 

For now my salvation is found in my dreams,

A picturesque fantasy of vulgar extremes.

Soon this little girl will be of age

To be released from her haven she deems a cage.

 

Reviews

[AmandaN]

Angry but sweet,beautiful imagery paints the picture you want us to see!
The last sentence gives a glimpse of understanding from two different perspectives and the confident surmise that these feelings won't last for too much longer,so long as she can wait it out just a little longer...

[dianalondon]

Yes it is exactly that, I was writing about myself in this poem, about the thoughts and emotions I had when I was younger. Thank you for reading my work and for your wonderful review.

[AmandaN]

I gotcha and you're most welcome :-)

[Lydia Shutter]

The rhyming in this one flowed easily and did not seem forced at all. Intense longing for personal freedom and a need to break away from the mundane is in every line. I could picture this poem being read on stage at an open mic night in a coffee house. I liked it. Lydi**

[dianalondon]

Thank you very much Lydia, I am looking forward to reading your poetry as well! You understand the meaning behind my pieces so well.

[ayosonolowo]

Nice written, you've really pen out.

[dianalondon]

Thank you very much :)

[Coyote Poetry]

I like the poem. All people need to taste freedom.
"I want a dance, I want a rave, the music evoking in my veins."
I tell the young people. Test life, travel and have some fun before you are too old. I like the energy and drove in the poem. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[dianalondon]

Thank you so much for reading my poems, and for writing such nice reviews. I am glad you enjoyed this :)

[Glen Yumang Manese]

The escape factor of being young... and the idea that once you go out there it's all this glamour and glitter... a reality check happens that the color is not so... fades quickly in the real scheme of things... I believe this can be better... the rhyme is a bit rushed... and the flow is not there... I just had a hard time with this verse... Just my opinion, others might see something different...

[dianalondon]

Thank you for this constructive criticism, this is really not one of my best poems, and does need work for there to be a better flow of rhythm.

[Glen Yumang Manese]

you're welcome...I see this was months ago...that I reviewed...