Sin

Sin

A Poem by Diana Owen Busy with Life BBS!

It is a lonely whisper upon the wind.

An empty glass of bottled sin.

A hunger that crawls beneath your skin.

A lust that consumes you from deep within.

It is a craving so strong it eats you whole,

as it slowly devours your soul.

It is a sudden urge to lose control.

A feeling you just can’t console

As you give in to its wicked ways,

and your vision begins to haze.

Something inside seems to sway

and your judgment comes in to play

The Devil screams as you prevail.

For he has yet again failed.

 

 

© 2008 Diana Owen Busy with Life BBS!


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Reviews

I like the fight in this poem. Good or bad.
I usually choose the latter as it's more fun.
Another well done poem.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Really good, it has a real deep sinister flow. I love "bottle of sin, " great discription.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I like how you show the allure of sin. Still, you show our power to overcome it. It is indeed a powerful adversary.

I adore the use of the red and the black. To me it speaks of a struggle between good and evil. The picture is perfect too as it utilizes the colors and the image of Satan.

You have done well to capture both the beauty and the ugliness of sin. You have demonstrated the power of sin and our ability to overpower it and become the victor. I think that this piece is amazing. Bravo.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Reading the other reviews, I must come from an odd sort of background, maybe one with a lot more "be good" conditioning built into it. For me, it's often harder to give in to "sin" (sorry, but I do hate that overused/misused word) than it is to say no to it. Not always, of course, but often. When I think about doing something I know is wrong, I feel as though I've got half a dozen pairs of accusing eyes looking over my shoulder.

Then again, that sometimes makes giving in to those desires that much more delicious.

I liked the poem, though, and the rhyming scheme and alternating colors. I thought it was nicely done.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very well said. it is a constant struggle we all face each day. Well done, great thoughts and a rather intricate work!

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Good point, I enjoyed the way you turned it into something more than just about sin, its about fighting sin. You don't have to commit sin, you choose to commit sin. Here's an example of how people have turned it into something beyound that. This is from Family Guy, "..and a jar of marmalade that we believe forces you to comitt adultry" Funny, but sadly this is how bad peple are becoming about sin and anything to do with it. I think this spoke extemely loud to me.
Great write,
Brentley


Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Yes it is easier to be bad then it is to do the right thing... I think we are have that fine line we walk on just most of us listen to our conscience... great flow and beautifully express emotions of being on the edge.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow!

Very intricate and elegantly written, yet very very powerful. "It is a lonely whisper upon the wind.

An empty glass of bottled sin ... " ... You had me captured 100% from the first lines ...
Excellent!

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

very excellent poem and the picture only added to the intensity of the poem. they rhyming was great and so is the black and red lines. it must've been hard to describe sin, i know i couldn't describe so wonderfully like you did. great job!! :)

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

wow. i like it! i loved its meaning only most poeple let sin take over. good poem and keep writing

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on February 6, 2008

Author

Diana Owen Busy with Life BBS!
Diana Owen Busy with Life BBS!

FL



About
I am a 36 year old married female.. My passion is to write. My genre is mostly in paranormal, paranormal romances and fantasy fiction. I have three wonderful children (Danyale 19- Josh 16 and Kymb.. more..

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