True Love

True Love

A Poem by Dianne
"

My definition of true love

"

 

True love acceptance
You as you, I as I, we
Perfect together

© 2008 Dianne


Author's Note

Dianne
This is my first attempt at poetry of any kind. Thanks Bonnie for introducing me to Haiku and Senryu.

My Review

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To set the record straight:
1. 5-7-5 syllables is the traditional american method. Japan doesn't use syllables like we do so it just doesn't equate.
2. Something of nature in the poem is traditional american and new Japan. The problem lies in the fact that the concept of Haiku didn't happen until quite recently in the history of Japan. It was pretty much the manufacture of one man. Before that the substance was specific to the person who was going to get the piece.
3. Senryu--and let me make this really clear--Senryu isn't JUST about human emotion. It's a comic slant on humanity. Kinda like the limerick.
4. The three line poem, the 17 syllable poem, the short nature poem and the human nature poem can all be found in other cultures around the world. There is, in fact, so many permutations and modifications of this kind of poetry that the moderators at wikipedia have been arguing over the Haiku entry for years and there's no end in sight.

My suggestion is we look at the intent and the grace of the poem and leave our ideas of what is and isn't a Haiku at home.

That being said, I find this piece of poetry to be quite deep in meaning. It has more heart than almost all of my poetry, Dianne. You might want to look a little at where you end your lines, though. Having the concepts lop over into the next line makes it feel a bit unbalanced and out of step.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

True love really is just that!
This is simply excellent!
Do some more!...lol

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I really like it. Looking forward to the next attempt. Have a great night!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Perfectly written, totally true and what a wonderful little poem for your first attempt at poetry. Great job!

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

True love well defined in a nicely composed Haiku. Thank you for sharing

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I totally agree
true love is about
Acceptance
Keep on writing and
have fun with it.

Best wishes


Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on May 30, 2008
Last Updated on June 15, 2008

Author

Dianne
Dianne

Livermore, CA



About
I'm a new writer. Oh, I've written stuff for work and such over the years, technical writing, lesson plans, resumes; you know the usual stuff of life. Instead I was always a reader. I read like crazy .. more..

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