The Willow Tree

A fictional poem about suicide

He looked at her like no other

Whenever he saw her he smiled

A real smile, not a fake one

But she would never smile back

 He saw the scars on her pale soft skin

He didn’t bother to ask what happened

He just assumed it was the cat

Her eyes were as blue as the sea

Her lips as pink as a rose

Her clothes practically hugging her body

She was simply beautiful

But one day she didn’t come to class

He was worried as she always came to class

He looked everywhere for the beautiful girl

He soon began to lose hope as she never came back

Everyone else had forgotten about her

But one night he found her

Hanging from a willow tree 

Reviews

[Stanley Wilson]

Beautifully written, I wasn't expecting the ending. Thought provoking indeed. Thanks for sharing.

[shadrach hah]

Hi Sam, this is such a strong and realistic write. It holds the attention from the beginning to the end. Even though you had written that it was a poem about suicide, I was still a little shocked when the end came. A skilful, creative write. This piece does make one think. Hugs always....Mike.

[barleygirl]

That you pick this innocent bystander to narrate your poem is what makes it feel so interesting. We're detached from what's going on, we can only see small glimpses, trying to piece it together, just like the narrator is. At first, I thought the narrator to be "suicide" itself, watching this girl & having it out for her. But that idea didn't pan out. All in all, your writing is powerful & authentic (((HUGS)))

[Coyote Poetry]

Silence, a deadly enemy. You create a girl of mystery and a sad story line in the poetry. To fight alone can lead to a sad ending. Thank you Sam for sharing the powerful words. You left something for the reader to think about.
Coyote

[Einstein Noodle]

title hooked me ... i love willow trees .. strong shock factor in your closing .. sheesh! the first person narrative is less emotive than if you had, for instance, told the story from "his" point of view .. or "her" point of view .. make me connect emotionally .. suicide is such an important issue and needs to be written and talked about, in my opinion... i imagine it can be very surprising to friends and families if those very clear clues are dismissed as they are in this poem ... we can help .. we can take a risk and reach out .. who knows .. we may just redeem a life that was adrift ... be well .. stay healthy .. hope this covid stuff has not been too terrible for you :)
E.