In the Rain

In the Rain

A Poem by SilentDreamer

 

Blonde hair, blue eyes

We stare up into the sky

Wishing on a rain cloud

As the thunder roars loud

Trees sway in the wind

As we start to spin

In the rain, in the rain

Trees sway

Sky and ground collide

Lightening brightens the world

As we twirl

The wind sings

It's sad tale of loss, false love

And lies, lies, lies

You know you and I, you and I

We will fly

Away from here

Away from fear

No more tears, no more, no tears

The rain peirces me like knives

Blonde hair, blue eyes

In the rain, in the rain

Trees sway

© 2010 SilentDreamer


Author's Note

SilentDreamer
Thanks for reading, please review and rate. I'm trying to get to a 95% rating! :) (I do not own the picture)

My Review

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Featured Review

This piece is definitely an attention grabber! The poem opens up with such description that it makes me yearn for more. The repetition in this poem is great, which is shocking because repetition can sometimes destroy the piece. The words are placed brilliantly and this is a key factor when writing poetry. Every image that you attempt to paint is pulled off flawlessly and I commend you that. Overall this ia great poem and you are clearly an amazing poet!

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.



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Reviews

wow..beautiful rain song...of pain and blonde hair and blue eyes...:)


Posted 7 Years Ago


pretty and I love the visual imagery!

Posted 8 Years Ago


I feel pain in your words .. loss of love .. A need to fly away .. ..

The rhythm sways, just right .. Jazz

Posted 8 Years Ago


I love the use of repetition in this poem. At first it had me confused, but then I grew to love it. It just makes me want to fly and twirl!

This poem gives me that giddy feeling of falling in love. My heart was pounding when I read it, and I couldn't help but smile at it. You did a good job at catching the emotions in this piece! Well done!

"It's sad tale of loss, false love
And lies, lies, lies" My favorite part!

Posted 8 Years Ago


This is a really good write. I actually felt like I staying and moving with the trees. Can't wait to read more of your stuff.

Posted 8 Years Ago


Beautiful poem1 I love the imagery and the hope that surrounds this poem! great write!

Posted 8 Years Ago


I love it..absolutely beautiful..I love how you've repeated some bits, it gives them more effect..very nice poem

Posted 8 Years Ago


This is an amazing poem! I love rain and I love the feel of this write great great work!

Posted 8 Years Ago


Ah, so beautiful. The meaning, the emotion, I love it. Especially the beginning, it starts off as a rhyme that just flows off your tounge and makes you want to read more. Good job :)

Posted 8 Years Ago



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1172 Views
39 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 6 Libraries
Added on November 18, 2010
Last Updated on November 18, 2010

Author

SilentDreamer
SilentDreamer

About
☼ Hey! Well I'm a writer, of course. I love hanging out with my friends, writing, reading, shopping, being outside, listening to music, cooking, gardening, photography, acting and playing guit.. more..

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