Because I love you more

To the person who claims to love me more.

When I say that I love you more,

it is because I do.

When I say that I love you more, 

I do,

because I love you more means:

staying up waiting to make sure you're okay,

even when my eyes can no longer take the stinging

and are dying to finally rest

it means 

holding in all that I am let down by, 

because I'd rather loose little things 

as oppose to loosing you

it means 

taking a deep breath and letting things happen, 

things I am not okay with,

because you are the one that holds my heart

it means

letting you silently stab me in the heart,

and letting you while I bleeding out

because I love you more.

When I say that I love you more, 

it is because I do. 

Author's Note

sorry for the grammar issues, it's late and just needed to get something off my chest

Reviews

[Dr. YumnaKay]

"because I love you more means:
staying up waiting to make sure you're okay,
even when my eyes can no longer take the stinging
and are dying to finally rest"
I so totally agree! When we love people wholeheartedly, it is rather difficult to sleep without knowing that they are alright.. I can so relate..
I loved your composition on the whole!! Its beautiful and wonderfully expressed! Great work here ☺

[emipoemi]

You have something powerful and profound that could potentially become something great. It really tugs at the heartstrings and plays them with feeling. You grammar is actually not that bad - the only error you've made is "loose/loosing" should lose an "o", otherwise it means something completely different. Poetically speaking, I don't have much to say either: Simply take out the second stanza except for the "because I love you more means", because the second stanza except for that line is essentially unnecessary repetition. Similarly at the end, when you stupendously bring back the main theme and message, simply put an "and" and the beginning and take out the "that" (for musicality purposes. Other than that: brava! This is a gem! Well done!