Longing for London

I still do vividly remember
the snows of London from that dream,
maybe a distant memory in December
flowing back in a constant stream.

In this other life we were musicians,
best friends performing all night.
So young with beautiful ambitions.
Beyond reach and out of sight.

When London was asleep,
we would laugh and drink the night away
sharing secrets to keep,
never minding what frosting winds say.

There we enjoyed nice wine.
There we never worried about a thing.
There life was truly, truly fine.
There we let our voices sing.

It is really all gone,
and here I am lying in my sheets,
with an untouched coffee at dawn
dreaming of walking down those streets.

Author's Note

Enjoy.

Reviews

[Mauricio Montoya]

like how it comes together, great job.

[Coyote Poetry]

I enjoyed London. A lot things to do. I would understand missing the old city. I like your description. I have always like the night. The entertaining people appear with the fall of the sun into the west. A very good ending to a excellent poem.
Coyote

[Donald Meikle]

Memory Lane is ever a loving stroll with no uphills to face.
Thanks for the trip.

[Enid Blake]

A fine trip down memory lane in true 'those were the days' style. We've all done it over some time or place. When I find myself doing such things I have to ask, 'So what's missing from the present right now then?'
Nice poem :)

[Nick.B]

Looking at the past with regret, "the good ol' days ", love the last stanza it really shows the sadness and regret on how they use to "rock London", very well done

[Adam Whitworth]

not enjoyable but keep trying

[Baby Ricochet]

Ah youth.

[Acron 4]

Wonderful poem, great subject, good meter and rhyme, good imagery.........Thanks for sharing

[Lexi I.]

This poem seems like a reflection on days long gone, and creates a feeling of melancholy for the reader.

If I could be constructively critical about one thing--which would may the poem PERFECT--I would say that there are some areas where the rhythm falls off a bit, and if you tweaked the syllable count a bit, I am sure that it would get there!

For instance, in the stanza with the wine, the syllable count is: 5, 10, 6, 7.
If you re-wrote lines 1 and 2 in that stanza, so that they would have 6 or 7 syllables, the rhythm would change as well. Random example:
"There we savored the sweet wine.
There we had our one night fling.
There life was truly fine.
There we let our voices sing."

These are just some thoughts. I don't know how serious you are about your poetry, but I wrote as if you were quite serious!

[black.butterfly]

Thank you much appreciated :) I enjoy critical opinions.

[Tex]

oh... this:
never minding what frosting winds say.
is something I wish I had written... wonderful line you have penned there.

great write this... Thank you for sharing.