Cold Fingers

Cold Fingers

 

 

November assumes its position

eleventh month's roll call

as trees shed remaining clothing

and the biting cold ruptures

brittle stanzas of poetry

into dusty frosted fragments

of once vibrant words

 

now just nakedly stressed syllables

standing at attention

like shivering scarecrows

unable to keep the black-voiced taunters

from harshly ripping to shreds

the accosted vowels

 

and consonantly undressed maples

severely ossify

the poet's meanings

 

even before the dead

of winter

ensues.

 

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

11/1/19

Reviews

[Lorry]

As winter looms, those thoughts of our words becoming brittle and turning to dusty fragments is so on the money that i was going to start by saying "get out of my head!"
And the last line really resonates too. Not even finished with autumn and the radio gleefully anounces that tomorrow a scandinavian nightmare will hit us tomorrow, instantly dropping us into the minus figures... But its fine, i just changed the station until i found a weather report that suited me better.
Ps... Its only our minds and bodies that suffer Jacob, your writing is still as good as ever 😀

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i wish we could change stations until we find a better state of the world...thank you, Lorry,
j.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

I'm get chills thinking about it. Hibernation seems like a good thing at times. We all need to rest and renew as our years like winter days grow shorter. Your personification is flawless.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your really kind words, Fabian,
j.

[Dave]

Naked trees and shivering scarecrows what an awesome description of the deep chill to be found only in winter. When I used to go skiing I once looked forward to it. Now its', to me, that season when I must shovel snow out of the driveway, drive extra carefully and check to make sure the electric blanket is working. I suppose age does a lot to change our perceptions and appreciations.

Take care - Dave

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and high electric bills...:)
yes, age does change perceptions...thank you for your words, Dave,
j.

[Carola]

hi jacob, i particularly like your 1st stanza..... "as trees shed remaining clothing" a brilliant line, the other stanzas i don't quite fully understand.
cheerio carola

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your read and comment, Carola,
j.

[Tinabells]

I thought you were actually saying that some writers are getting cold in writing. They are discouraged that their writings are no longer effective and don't actually reach the readers' attention. But this is good Sir Jacob :) Keep on writing, keep on inspiring us.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i like that interpretation.....thank you for your insights, Tinabells,
j.

[KWP]

well actually i found that write quite sexy and alluring ... is that wrong? being a sun-worshipper i find this thought quite intriguing :)

this paints a great picture for a gal who lives in Good Old Sydneytown - warmth can still be found in the dead of winter .. X Hi Jacob - love the new profile pic X

[jacob erin-cilberto]

not wrong at all....i like that you could find it that way....thank you on the poem...and your nice comment on the pic.
j.

[andrew mitchell]

Nicely written Jacob, I do like winter, it has a charm all on its own as long as one is inside warm. Its just beautiful in its stillness.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, andrew...
j.

[Alisa Js]

Aloha,

I love how you capture the desolate coldness of the season for those of us out here who don't get to experience it.

Well done.

Alisa ;-)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Alisa,
j.

[emmajoy]

'.. and the biting cold ruptures - brittle stanzas of poetry - into dusty frosted fragments - of once vibrant words .. ' Superb phrasing. Whatever you write about, you see with that magic eye some people have, adventuring readers' minds into different places !

However, am a rare fish who loves the Winter, even though i curse it daily, season long! BUT, when I see the magnificence of naked oaks, prints left by birds stippling the snow, the countryside standing outlined on the horizon by the cold air, etc -I'm lost. 'Can't help but feel as if i'm being shown yet another world, jacob, It IS stripped of colour and seemingly dead, yes - but surely it's the most truthful and real of seasons, untouched by Human make.overs?

Your crisp phrasing, your metaphors and more are brilliant, as always.. Your students must learn so much from you1.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, em...
actually i appreciate the cold...but Snow cancels tennis...so don't like it so much...
i really appreciate you sharing your winter time philosophy...
j.

[Chris Shaw]

Briiant title Jacob. Cold Fingers had me reflecting back to life in the 50's. I remembered my mum sewing mittens on elastic and threading it through the sleeves of my coat. Anything to keep my fingers warm. Your first stanza is so wintery. Your second has some really fine imagery. Those scarecrows shivering is quite freaky. Winter can be incredibly beautiful, but it is also a cruel season and a taker of lives as well as a destroyer of the environment at times. Always such a pleasure to read your work and you are such an inspiration to us all.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind words, Chris,
j.