Ariel's Dark Wing

Ariel's Dark Wing

Plath me,
i'll turn off the gas
so we can both dream in vapors
of hopelessness
and maybe find a way out of the cavern
that is our craving for the bullet,
or the cut
or the madness of love suffocating a heart
transcending to a mind that wants to shut down

the towel is under the door
and it is safe
within the chambers of the gun
to touch the metal foreclosure
of life.

Plath me,
i'll turn off the gas
but explode into a fruition of contrition
for writing all the dark poetry
even i can no longer feel

Plath me,
and we'll Ted together
in a cradled bed together
exchanging worms

and calling them poems.

Reviews

[andrew mitchell]

Plath died from carbon monoxide poisoning resulting from depression which resonates in the darkness of this poem as well as a cry for help from the loneliness. This is where you took me.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and those closest couldn't hear the cries because they were too close.
thank you, andrew,
read moreand those closest couldn't hear the cries because they were too close.
thank you, andrew,
j.

[Chris Shaw]

I’ll turn off the gas, oh if only. This poem conveys the despair of deep depression. Dark as dark and the Ted word and worms send a little shiver down my spine. Oh what a tangled web was left in her wake. This poem hurts to read dear J as I think of her children and what followed on after her death and then what happened to Assia. Touches the core this poem does and deeply so.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Chris...
j.

[Ken e Bujold]

Grand poem Jacob. A melancholy ode to the melancholy nature of a butterfly who simply had to fly away.

What I really admire about this poem is the depth of understanding. How the narrator reaches to the subject without judging. Offers comfort against the darkness.

As you and I have spoken before about the complicated relationship between Plath and Hughes, let me just say I find it refreshing to read a poem where a Plath devotee can pass what is the almost obligatory shot at Hughes. For those who truly want to parse the line "and we'll Ted together" the openness is refreshing. It can be read as much as a soothing lullaby to love's ache as any other interpretation.

a master's work my friend

ken

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind review, ken,
j.

[Lorry]

This is so good Jacob, that I'll need to give it a few more reads before reviewifying propellorly, but your words do bring to mind a documentary I once saw, that had an actual reenactment of her putting the towel under the door in order to "save" her kids the distress of her suicide, which in itself should have set off alarm bells that she was seriously ill with depression. But it must have made some sense to her in her disturbed mind. I do wonder if her greatness and acclaim she is now held in would have saved her, if only she had known.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I am not sure much made sense to her except for her poetry...and her love of Ted's work, still, despite how much he hurt her.

[John the Baptist]

Well, Sylvia wasn't the happiest poet who ever lived, although I understand her spouse wasn't the epitome of support, either. This offering captures the despair the poor woman must have experienced in her last days. Very creative image in the last verse. What better image for death and despair than worms?

[jacob erin-cilberto]

No, Ted was far from that...Self-centered jerk really....Just whom she did not need.

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

The last verse
I liked
The play on words
Being buried with worms together writing poetry
This is a dark macabre write you get away with it with your talent Jacob and leave the reader thinking they are still composing poetry underground
Well done

Suicide leaves nothing to ones imagination eg by gas fire drowning wrists jumping it’s all yuk and awful but you seem to have succeeded in this write
It proves you can write on any subject and make it enjoyable almost even if the subject is sad 😞

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your very kind words, j.

[Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)]

Hope you well. Not kind just truth

[W. Barrett Munn]

This is so dark that even Poe would say, that’s a bit much, and Bukowski would pour another shot and smile grimly.

Winston

[jacob erin-cilberto]

maybe Bukowski would fall off his stool and hit his head hard enough, he might become likable...
read moremaybe Bukowski would fall off his stool and hit his head hard enough, he might become likable...
thanks, Winston,
j.

[W. Barrett Munn]

Doubtful, I am guessing

[Cherrie Palmer]

Alright, no more pickles and ice cream before bed. It curdles the ink.
I'm going to have to send you a puppy and a 3 Stooges video 📹. 😇

Strong poem with vivid images and no lifeline to cling to. This is the Full-Monty of despair. In a past life I've fielded to many of these calls and the curse they bind the survivors with.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

You are so clever in your reviews...thanks, Cherrie...
and could you make it Men In Black on the Stooges...I loved that one.
j.

[Cherrie Palmer]

You give in to the moment you write about so freely. It always grabs the reader and holds their attention.