A Saturday Morning Rhyme

A Saturday Morning Rhyme

the skin starts sagging

the brain starts lagging

filtered life

of selective attention

with little or no retention

but love still touches my heart

even as we are forever apart.

erin-cilberto

4/28/25

Reviews

[Buddhistboy73]

sounds like a fine Saturday morning to me....
I like the last 2 lines which seem more hopeful than the initial lines...
BB73

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, BB73.
j.

[D. Mansfield]

Very relatable poem Jacob. I don't remember alit these days. But I remember all the love

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, D.
j.

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Wonderful write Jacob love this so true

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Julie,
j.

[Ted Kniffen]

AS our dear friends the Beatles sang
"and in the end...the love you take is equal to the love you make."

The body sags ... hand strength diminishes ... but Love abides.

j. always appreciate your words of love in all its guses...and the hope they inspire.

The face and body may sag ... but inside there is still that young man wondering ...
what the Hell happened.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Nothing like Abbey Road and some Golden Slumber.
Thanks, Ted,
j.

[Relic]

We're all like pears sitting on the ground, fallen beneath the tree. And life is like the bees that come along and land on us.

Inside, the sweet part, I guess that's the last two lines here.

Good one, J.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I really like your analogy, Relic.
thank you.

[Desert Knave]

Definitely quite the punch in those last 2 lines. Well done. ~Jim

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Jim.
j.

[Chris Shaw]

Ah the aging process. Good though, if love can still touch your heart even if it is a memory. Sad brevity dear J.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind words, Chris.
j.

[Thomas W Case]

Great work. Powerful in brevity.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you ,Thomas.
j.

[John the Baptist]

This one has a "Don't give up the ship!" quality to it. Life may be "filtered," but the hope of love is still there.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, John.
j.

[redzone]

even when our skin sags and we become forgetful, we really never forget the one we love(d).
-Curt

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Curt.
j.