Broken Rain

Broken Rain 

By: Ethan West

I am not like you

A battered bridge for others use

I am not like me

The man who fell down on his knees

A broken heart tied up with thread

Left scars of silence in it's tread

And even now my thought does cease

As tired mind attempts to ease

My sorrows right here ending my pain

Like a rusted rain jacket to fend off the rain

But rust as rust will, will crumble and fall

And drenched in my tears I'll desperately crawl

Away from the blood that broken heart leaks

Away from the pain that broken mind seeks

My pain has a way of being around

To beat me to death as I fall to the ground

The rain and the blood from broken heart patched

Like nothing I've seen, my spirit has crashed

It leaves me like this, away from my health

What was in my heart is now in my self

I lifted my head and she was above

Her face bore the grace of a beautiful dove

She beat me to death on that beautiful plain

My tears and my blood serenading the rain

My tears and my blood will fill me again

My tears and my blood will fill me again

Author's Note

Any feedback is greatly appriciated

Reviews

[Timeless-Chan]

wow i'm awestruck by the pure emotion and expression that this piece holds. the battle that the narrator goes through is just pure sorrow and pain. and the last lines just seem to pull the piece together perfectly. I love the line "My tears and my blood serenading the rain" it's both beautiful and heartbreaking.
Bravo:)

[ewest1220]

Thanks! I'm thrilled you like it!

[Admiral Kirk]

To me, this poem speaks of all the sorrows left behind from a terrible heartbreak. This poem is too complex for me to break down and really analyze, but a very strong overall picture comes through very clearly. Great work!

[ewest1220]

You hit the nail right on the head. Thank you so much for the review and thanks for reading :D

[Admiral Kirk]

No problem, it was a pleasure. :)

[Melody]

This is...beautiful, but I'm also about to start tearing up a little just from reading it. It radiates pain of crashed heart.
I love the emotion and the depth, but what I really love is the repetition of the 2nd to last line. :) It was beautifully heartfelt and deep. Great job, I know I will continue being a fan of yours now.

[ewest1220]

Wow thanks! I'm really really glad you like my work.

[Lily Mae]

I agree with Laura.. very deep and heartfelt..

[ewest1220]

Thanks!

[Laura]

This is beautiful. I love the voice that reaches out to make you feel and relate.

[ewest1220]

Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it

[Laura]

I did, thank you :)