A Figure in the Night

A Figure in the Night

A Story by ewest1220
"

Please. Help me. I cannot Remember. It isn't real.... It isn't real...

"

A Figure in the Night

By: Ethan West


Reality. Can it really be as simple as what you see, what you hear?  Or is there something more?  Is reality what we can perceive or is it something we could never hope to comprehend?   Even if it was would we even be able to recognize something beyond our senses if we do not have the ability to sense it happening in the first place?


What reality is truly there when you can read what a writer has brought before you and enter the world he created?  What sense exists that allows you to enter a world your senses cannot tell?


I beg you to remember that this story is not real.  Your senses cannot tell my story, only I can.  You see words shed in ink on the page but you cannot see the beating heart behind them.  You hear these words as if they're your own but while the words are in your voice they are yours.  Created by you for a hope of understanding what your senses cannot depict as real.


So please remember, as far as your senses can tell, this story is not real.  In that same sense I am not real.  I'm simply the ink on the page that, by you, has been given the face of man.  I don't exist because in your reality I have not been brought to life.


And in that sense of false reality I tell a story reality has kept hidden from itself in your eyes.  I will tell you a story that reality, or lack thereof, will prove false.


It was a dark night the night it happened.  However my heart was ever darker, making the night around me appear bright as day through my tormented eyes.


But while my eyes brought nothing to mind but the headstone at my feet my imagination ran wild.  I jumped at the soft wind; I pointed my pistol at every shadow.  It was all in vain, for these fantasies I could not comprehend.


Something was there I know it!  It was too peaceful in the graveyard for the sins I was about to commit! Too quiet!  To kindly!


"Where are you?" I screamed as I fired my pistol into a dark corner.


A form fell from within the shadow with a soft thud.  I yelled in triumph at my victory.  My eyes rolled back into my skull in demented pleasure as my wild screeching laugh rent my mind asunder.


I ran towards where I had seen the body fall and reached into the shadows.  But my hand met nothing but the cool air.  I screamed in frustration and ran back to the headstone.


 My crazed eyes scanned the area around the headstone.  In the corner of my eye I saw the shadow move again.  This time however I stopped.  Waiting for the b*****d to make his move first.  He just stood there.  Am I mad?  Does my mind play me false?


The figure approached me without so much as a sound.  I felt a fire burning in my heart as fear overwhelmed my fragile soul.


It was at that moment; when the pain was about to completely overtake my ignorant mind that I was foolish enough to look down.  My eyes brought me reality.  My chest had become a white-hot flame.


I screamed in agony.  This isn't real.  Please oh please it cannot be real.


The man drew ever closer, and the flame increased in intensity.  "My god the pain in unbearable.  I cannot escape it!"


I raised my pistol and squeezed the trigger.  The man fell as the gun melted in my hand.  The powder in the bullet casings ignited and the gun burst into liquid fire.  Melting away the flesh from my hand and forearm.


The pain is unbearable.  I was unable to stand any longer.  I fell to my knees poised to pray.  But I can do nothing but scream.


The flames were, are, gone.  My heart that had once given me life now hastened my demise.  I have long forgotten why I am here.  I simply watched as the blood rushed from my arm in frenzied bursts.  The blood my heart rejected, the life I could never have.


I had forgotten my original intentions.  However I had killed the dark figure.  I reached for the figure but my pale hand closed again on nothing.


I clutched my forehead.  My head is spinning and I cannot move.  My ears are deaf.  Life itself, is killing me.


I am dying.  I have lost myself.  Am I telling this tale or living it?  I cannot tell anymore.


The figure stood up.  Its torso scarred heavily and shining with warm puss.  His forearm was gone, and blood was pulsing rapidly from the wound.


What did I do?  Have I done this to myself?  I'm grabbing a knife.  I'm holding it up to my throat.  I'm smiling.


Please. Help me.  I cannot remember.  It isn't real... it isn't real...

© 2012 ewest1220


Author's Note

ewest1220
Have you ever been writing and suddenly felt yourself slip into the character? I attempt to bridge the gap between telling a story and living. Beware this one is eeire. Thanks for reading!

Any feedback would be great! Thank you!

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Featured Review

A very good tale in the story. I like the way you led me into the twisted tale. I like the mystery and the strong ending. Real and not real can twist our dreams and life. I like the complete story. A perfect ending to a outstanding story.
Coyote

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Wow I'm really glad you liked the twist in this one! Thanks for reading!



Reviews

Great story telling. This did justice in the realm of getting the message across. Great message. There's lot of times where a story can have a great message to aim for, and have a lot of under lining things but then no one gets it, and if no one gets it, then the point has failed. But in my opinion this did well to get the message across. You made it clear, which is why I think it's good. Keep up the good work. What was also great was that I could imagine the story as I read it, and that is also a strong point of stories. The ability to have the reader imagine it because after all we're reading not watching it, but it was as if I was there as I read this, and that is great. Great visuals and great story telling. It had plot and substance. When you add substance to writing it gets that much better. It gets the reader hooked on it and make them feel as if they are part of it. As long as their is that emotional connection between the reader and the story then it's good. The connection you were able to established in the writing gives the reader a sense of comfortably that they are in tune with the writing. So that way when the writing is over, the reader wants more, and wishes it didn't end. I feel the same way when I watched a movie or tv series that I get so attached to, I never want it to end. And for this writing, I didn't want it to end. You had me hooked, and I am sure everyone else who read it was hooked as well. That is good, that is what you want for people to keep wanting more. The way you put the story together makes me feel like my life is different for that moment in which I read your story. I love it, and it was beautiful. Just keep posting stories like this, and you'll have a good following.

Posted 4 Years Ago


loved the beginning and the twist you placed into the story. Great job with the adjectives btw and I hope more work comes like this.

well done mate :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Thanks! Glad you liked it my friend :) Thanks for reading!
You see words shed in ink on the page but you cannot see the beating heart behind them.
This line is... wow... seriously.
I love the themes and how you ARE the character and you make the reader feel as though they are too...
Another amazing piece :3

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Thanks! I'm really glad you enjoyed it!
Very dark. I did actually feel myself slip into this character eventually. And it was, as you said, eerie. I liked the beginning a lot. Reality is something we'll never comprehend, but it's fun to think about, isn't it?
Thanks for another good read! :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

No problem :) I'm thrilled you liked it! Thanks for reading!
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Pax
i noticed the gap..and like reality it shift to a darker tone. a wonderful job.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it it's always a pleasure!
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Lee
"...Created by you for a hope of understanding what your senses cannot depict as real."

-Indeed... Majority of what is written is in an attempt to understand something- an idea, a feeling, or merely ourselves. We are all trying to make sense of something, yet as we struggle to logically figure out Life or reality, we may neglect to see that our understandings is marked by perception. And we're biased to our own perceptions.. So, illusions ... reality... could very well be the same thing.

I enjoyed the initial thought process you led us through. And the story itself was a dark, crazed, yet thrilling mindset to follow. Great imagery & diction; "The man fell as the gun melted in my hand." ( One of my favorite Lines ) I did find a small error in the paragraph above that line, "My god the pain in unbearable". A quick tweek there. All in all, nice work.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Ah good eye! I'll change that ASAP I'm thrilled you liked my work! Thank you so much for reading!
I really like the purgatory between fiction and really, an amazing way to look at things. some really powerful lines in there too, and an equally powerful ending.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Thanks! I actually got overly wrapped up in this and freaked the hell out of myself lol but anyways.. read more
The ending is scary! But that's what makes it interesting.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Thanks! Glad you liked it!
A story, especially a very good one, can easily transport the reader to another place, another time; even a totally different plane of existence. It ensares us and draws us in, like a spider awiting a juicy insect, and at the finish, delivers it's coup de grace with deadly precision. You did just that to me with this eerie piece!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Once again a very great review my friend! Thank you for your insight and I'm thrilled that you like.. read more
Dean Kuch®

8 Years Ago

The pleasure was entirely mine...

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757 Views
18 Reviews
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Shelved in 4 Libraries
Added on July 17, 2012
Last Updated on July 23, 2012
Tags: short stories, dark, reflective

Author

ewest1220
ewest1220

Columbia Falls, MT



About
I have been writing for as long as I can remember. I have been featured in about 4 books, have won several contests for my work and currently have a paperback edition of my works. (Titled "A Winter Wa.. more..

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