A Man in the Night

A Man in the Night

A Story by ewest1220
"

Do not worry for me, for the real me no longer exists...

"

The Man in the Night

By: Ethan West



    "Could it be that in a simple moment in time all that was, and all that could be, could be rent asunder as easily as a knife through butter?  When I stood there that night I simply could not comprehend my own loss, my weary eyes only perceived a slight feeling of guilt.  For love had left me that night.  Or perhaps love had never found me, I really did not know.


   Needless to say after that night I was not quick to pursue the affection of another.  My heart was a fortress that could not be broken.  A double edged sword it seemed, protecting me against hurt but also keeping me away from happiness.  My emotions fogged until I could not truly create them.  Sure I smile, sure I laugh.  But my eyes are forever cold, lost in an endless sea of nothing.  Blank as the night that surrounds us tonight.


     For that moment where I lost my humanity seems so far in the past I look at it now as if through a dense fog.  I cannot remember who did this to me.  I cannot remember why it had to happen.  All I know is that it happened, and no matter who was responsible I pay the price.


     The night is truly beautiful tonight isn't it?  Can you not see the stars scattered across the midnight sky?  It creates the simplest tapestry, but also one more beautiful than anything mankind could imagine creating.  And look at the moon directly overhead.  It is among these stars like an outsider.  But the stars accept it as part of this great tapestry even though they know nothing about it.


     Why am I talking to you about this you ask?  Why not talk about the beauty of the night when it is all around us?  When the hellish commotion of the day is stifled by the silent beauty of the night why should we not celebrate?  Why should we not rejoice at the beauty given to us so freely by nature?


    I cannot enjoy this beauty, but you can.  For you see my life is as good as ended, as it is a life without change.  As steadfast this night sky, and as somber as the moon.  Soak in the beauty of the night because I cannot truly comprehend it.  I can create a false enjoyment but this is a useless gesture at best.


     But do not do this for me, do this for you.  Do not hide away your heart, let it see the moon, the sky and the stars.  Do not lock your heart away as I did.  For you will find it is easy to lose the key to the lock.


     Do not worry for me, for the real me no longer exists.  Can you not feel the calm aura around you?  I cannot, but this is no matter of yours.  Rest and relax now, for this night was created for you. Let your spirit shine with glory so that the spirits of others will hasten to your side.  Relax and enjoy this splendor for it is yours to keep."


    Samuel watched as the strange man faded away into the night.  He tried to allow his mind to relax but something seemed odd about what the man said.  "Why would he say that to me?"  He thought with frustration.  Suddenly the sound of sobs reached Samuels's ears and he turned to meet the sound.  A woman was crying not twenty yards from where he lay.  He got up slowly and looked around the clearing.


     The voice of the man rang through his head.  "Let your spirit shine with glory so that the spirits of others will hasten to your side."  How had he not seen her before?   "Relax and enjoy this splendor, for it is yours to keep."  What did he mean splendor?  There was nothing grand about this at all.  His head felt numb.  His hands trembled.


      He slowly lifted himself from the grassy hillside and looked over to where the man had disappeared. "You're wrong," he said to the night.  "It's not about me..."  He strode across the clearing to the woman, who's sobs were still echoing around the clearing.  "Allow your soul to be free,"  he thought to himself.  "Give your soul unto another."


     The strange man watched in silence as Samuel and the woman comforted each other.  Their voices muted by the still silence of the night.  He turned his gaze to the star lit sky.  Two translucent figures had risen into the air, white as the stars, but dim as a shadow.  He smirked softly as the great white shadows merged together.  A tear fell from his eye as the merged shadow raised itself up, losing it's grip on the grassy slope and flying away into the sky.


     "I'm afraid it is you who are wrong." he said slowly.  "There is no giving involved in the miracle you have performed tonight.  You just both realized you had a gift... to give..."  He sighed peacefully and continued on his lonely way, his boots dragging through the thin grass.  Above him the beautiful form of love continued to fly.  And it would not stop until it reached heaven's great doorstep.

© 2012 ewest1220


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Author's Note

ewest1220
Another one from the vault. Wrote it about 4 years ago so there may be typos. Let me know what you guys think!

My Review

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Featured Review

Finally around to my RR's and here. Beautiful tale and an age old story, but told in a new and interesting way. Loved it. You paint your scenes with words quite well and this write picks up speed with that as it moves on. My ONLY suggestion is to find another metaphor for the like a knife through butter reference in the first part of the story. Your eloquotion is so - beautiful and - well that one is just ... tired - and it sits at the beginning of this beautifully illustrated story and - it distracted me a bit. I just think you've got something better in you. Only suggestions.... and of only one person.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Hmm... actually that's a very interesting suggestion I'll look into it :) thanks for your help and I.. read more
Shelley Holt-Lowrey

8 Years Ago

Phew! Never know how those "Just one thing..." suggestions will be taken. so thanks. The piece is.. read more
ewest1220

8 Years Ago

lol thanks! Don't worry about criticism here I welcome it! Thanks again for reading :)



Reviews

Great story telling. This did justice in the realm of getting the message across. Great message. There's lot of times where a story can have a great message to aim for, and have a lot of under lining things but then no one gets it, and if no one gets it, then the point has failed. But in my opinion this did well to get the message across. You made it clear, which is why I think it's good. Keep up the good work. What was also great was that I could imagine the story as I read it, and that is also a strong point of stories. The ability to have the reader imagine it because after all we're reading not watching it, but it was as if I was there as I read this, and that is great. Great visuals and great story telling. It had plot and substance. When you add substance to writing it gets that much better. It gets the reader hooked on it and make them feel as if they are part of it. As long as their is that emotional connection between the reader and the story then it's good.

Posted 4 Years Ago


Finally around to my RR's and here. Beautiful tale and an age old story, but told in a new and interesting way. Loved it. You paint your scenes with words quite well and this write picks up speed with that as it moves on. My ONLY suggestion is to find another metaphor for the like a knife through butter reference in the first part of the story. Your eloquotion is so - beautiful and - well that one is just ... tired - and it sits at the beginning of this beautifully illustrated story and - it distracted me a bit. I just think you've got something better in you. Only suggestions.... and of only one person.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Hmm... actually that's a very interesting suggestion I'll look into it :) thanks for your help and I.. read more
Shelley Holt-Lowrey

8 Years Ago

Phew! Never know how those "Just one thing..." suggestions will be taken. so thanks. The piece is.. read more
ewest1220

8 Years Ago

lol thanks! Don't worry about criticism here I welcome it! Thanks again for reading :)
This is a great piece of writing. It entails a lot and readers would surely get a moral or lesson from it. I sure did.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Thanks! I'm glad the message was able to shine through :) Thank you so much for reading and I'm th.. read more
Junert

8 Years Ago

You're welcome.
This is truly awesome! I really like your writing style, very descriptive, yet not annoyingly so. You have an amazing gift!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Thanks! Once again I'm really thrilled you enjoyed this!
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NA
It's not bad, I'm not keen on the title but that's just my own opinion. There are definitely seeds of talent planted in there.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Interesting, a quick question if you have what would you title it? I would love some feedback there.. read more
NA

8 Years Ago

I'm not too sure really if I'm honest with you haha, I think the title should come to the author aft.. read more
ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Very true. A great example of that is how much attention my piece "I Know Not Why the Caged Bird Sc.. read more
Descriptive good write.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Thanks!
A very good story. I like the way you led the reader into a very good story.
"There is no giving involved in the miracle you have performed tonight. You just both realized you had a gift... to give..."
I like the positive ending to the outstanding story.
Coyote

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Wow thanks! Always a pleasure to hear from you Coyote!
One word: #Awesome ^_~

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

lol thanks!
Loved the imagery and endless description. Glad to have stumbled upon the piece.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

Thanks! I'm really glad you enjoyed it!
Beautiful. It reminds me of Shakespear, or Lovecraft( though I have never read him, the language in it is maybe something he would write) .

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ewest1220

8 Years Ago

I have read a couple things by Lovecraft I think... Either way I'm absolutely thrilled you enjoyed t.. read more
emilythestrange

8 Years Ago

:D

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871 Views
22 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on July 25, 2012
Last Updated on July 25, 2012
Tags: short stories, dark, love

Author

ewest1220
ewest1220

Columbia Falls, MT



About
I have been writing for as long as I can remember. I have been featured in about 4 books, have won several contests for my work and currently have a paperback edition of my works. (Titled "A Winter Wa.. more..

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