Chapter Thiry-Seven: Letters From The Dead

Dear Katie

"Katie-Chan catch" Hiroshi Seoul-Oh, Chiyo's twin brother, says making Katie look up from the magazine she and Chiyo were reading. The twins and Katie had become fast friends in the month since she had moved, constantly hanging out at the Garage much to Shawn's Displeasure, but he couldn't say no to Katie. Katie looks up to see Hiroshi Tossing something at her, it doesn't reach her all the way and clanks to the ground, rolling under her bed. She pegs him off making him laugh and gets on the ground to retrieve the object. Her hand paws around underneath, her finger tips brushing over some type of paper, lifting the bed skirt she peers under the bed noticing two dust covered envelopes.

 

"What the-" She mutters as she drags them out. Brushing the dust off she sees her name written on one of them and Shawn's on the other, The handwriting making her breath stop short, it was Hans. She leans against the bed and draws her legs up close, remembering the night when he had told her he had written a letter to her and her brother. With everything going on she had forgotten all about them, now they were staring at her, their dusty jackets glaring up at her.Chiyo and Hiroshi sit on either side of her and peer at them.

 

"What is that?" Chiyo asks making her blink up at her.

 

"Someone from home wrote them, one for me and one for my brother," She whispers, "Hey guys would it be terribly rude if I asked you guys to go home? I have to read this and give the other to my brother, its highly personal." She says hoping they wouldn't get mad. She looks up at Hiroshi and watches as his face softens, and he nods, his twin mirroring him.

 

"No of course we wont be mad, we'll see you Monday OK?" He says standing up and dusting off his khakis before pulling his sister to hers. She stands up and walks them to her door, smiling as Chiyo gives her a hug.

 

"Text or call if you need anything OK?" She whispers into her ear. Katie nods and lets her go, waving goodbye as they push open the metal doors and head for the landing. She walks back in and curls up on her bed clutching the envelopes to her chest, afraid to open hers. She wanted to be getting over Han, not reading his words and falling for him all over again, but she knew she had to read it. Sighing she slowly opens the letter, shocked when she sees a letter that was written front and back of the page.

 

Katie,

 

Its around 1 in the morning, Today you told me something that made my heart stop. You're leaving for Tokyo because you can't live here anymore. I know why you did it, And I'm sorry. I'm sorry I walked out on you, I regret it everyday. But please understand my point. I love you Katie, I love you more than anyone in this world, But I couldn't stand by and watch you destroy your life, I was so afraid to lose you that I pushed you away thinking if I distanced myself from you than it would hurt less. But I was wrong It hurts more, I feel like my heart has been ripped out, and I know its all my own fault.I don't know how to make it right between us and I'm terrified that I wont ever be able to fix it. Have I lost you forever?

 

I was just laying here in bed and do you know what popped into my head? That first night We talked when you had a flashback and called yourself a freak. I think it was right then that I fell in love with you, I just didn't know it yet. You weren't a freak, You still aren't. I saw you as a fallen angel striving to get her wings back, her life back. You were my imperfect Fallen angel, and that's what makes you perfect in my eyes. You're such a strong beautiful women Katie, Even if you don't believe it yourself its still the truth. You struggle everyday to survive to not let you're past consume you, you're a fighter. And that's just one of the many things I love about you, You're an independent,( incredibly stubborn) kind hearted women. I could ramble on and on make list after list of all the reasons why I love you but this letter would be a million pages long and I don't have enough paper and all the stores are closed so I can't get more.

 

Please just know that no matter where you go I will always be here for you, even if you hate me, even if you don't want anything to do with me, I will still be here for you. I don't just love you Katie I'm in love with you. After Isabell died I never thought I could love again, I thought all my love died with her, and then you came along and no matter how much I tried to stay away from you, no matter how much I fought back you stole my heart, You stole it and still have it. You once said that I broke my promise that I gave up on you. But you're wrong. I will NEVER give up on you, I still haven't I will always be rooting for you and have your back. I'm sorry that I made you feel like I was giving up on you, but I wasn't, you have to believe me when I say that. You have to believe my words, all of them. Because everything in this letter is true, yes I know it's jumping around from thought to thought but that's because my mind is so scattered right now.

 

But out of all the things I have said I know in my heart the truest thing I have written is the simple fact that I'm in love with you Kathrine Theresa Hendricks. If you need a reminder just look at that ring, It's my promise to you Katie. I promise you Forever, And I stick by my promise

 

With All My Love,

 

     Han  

 

 

Tears spill onto the page making the ink run as a strangled sob claws its way from her throat. She rereads his words over and over again, her broken heart somehow mending. She lifts her hand and looks at the promise ring a smile tugging at her trembling lips. He truly did love her, and she didn't really blame him for walking away. Not anymore, he did  what she had always done, push people away to keep from getting hurt. And she had hurt him, he had been right when he had said she couldn't possibly understand what its like finding the one you love unconscious and close to death. She shivers and hugs the letter to her, as if holding it close would help her commit every word of it to memory. She feels something drop out of her envelope and looks down on the bed to see a picture of Han and her, at friendly's. She remembers that day clearly and she smiles as she picks it up and studies it. It was the day that they took Melina drifting for the first time and had gone to Friendlys afterwards because her stomach had growled so loudly. It had been a fun dinner, jokes being made, laughter, a few silly pics of the three of them, and this one. Han had whip cream on the end of his nose as Katie laughed, her head thrown back, he was smirking at her with love in his eyes, and if you looked closely and knew to look for it you could see their joined hands just below the table line. She flips the picture over to see he had written something on the back "If Shawn needs proof, show him this." It says in Han's messy cursive. S**T SHAWN! Katie jumps off her bed and snatches up the other letter, Shawn's name written in heavy black ink in Han's writting . She runs out of her room and down the hallway to the metal doors, bursting through them like the devil was after her.

 

"Hey woah Where's the fire girl?" Twinkie says jumping up from the couch, the game controller still in his hand. She puts her finger up in a one minute gesture as she tries to catch her breath.

 

"Where... Is..... Shawn?" She huffs. Twinkie just gives her a concerned look before nodding his head to the office, plopping back down and returning to the game. She gives him a grateful smile and heads over. When she gets there she looks in to see Shawn scribbling away in one of the books he used to run the garage. Knocking on the wall he Jumps and whirls around in the swivel chair. "Can I talk to you?" she asks slipping in and pulling the sectional door into place. He turns back to the books, picking up the pen again and scribbling away.

 

"Katie can it wait? I really need to get this done." He asks distracted. She puts her hand on his shoulder and lifts the picture up so he can see it.

 

"I don't think you will want it to wait." She whispers as he spies the picture. The pen drops out of his hand as he snatches the picture from him, his face paling like he had seen a ghost when he realizes who the person was.

 

"How..How is this possible, He's-"

 

"Dead? Here, I think this will explain it better then I could." She says handing him the letter. He just keeps staring at the picture, his eyes glazing over. "Shawn take the letter trust me you will want to read it." She urges him pushing the letter toward him. He looks at the letter and slowly opens it, almost like it was a deadly snake and he was afraid that it was going to strike at any moment. He takes the letter out and reads it, his face going even whiter as tears leak out of his eyes, emotions from rage to sorrow to pain to happiness back to rage floods his face at a mile a minute. The letter falls from his fingers and floats down to the ground in defeat as his whole body shakes form emotional overload. She gets up and goes over to him placing a hand on each shoulder forcing him to look at her. His eyes glasses and full of Rage. "Shawn talk to me what's going in that head of yours?" She says urgently. He laughs a bitter laugh.

 

"He's been alive all these years and not ONCE did he find it important to tell me?" he hisses, his hands balling into fists. Katie frowns.

 

"Think about it Shawn, if the old DK had found out he was alive he would have come straight here and made your guys life a living hell trying to find him. Han didn't want that to happen he didn't want his friends to pay for his mistakes. At least that's what he told me once." She explains to him, praying her older brother would understand. He just looks up at her, his eyes portraying the hurt he was feeling inside.

 

"You two were together?" He asks changing the subject and looking at the picture and of course being a big brother immediately zoomed in on their hands. Katie swallows and shrugs, telling him the truth.

 

"Never officially together, but together none the less." She says receiving a raised eyebrow She sighs and slumps down on the floor, leaning against the desk, "It's complicated Shawn, He's ten years older then me, friends with Dom And Bryan, and with everything that happened to me, we could never be together. Please don't get mad at him Shawn, I swear he never hurt me, or pushed me to do things I didn't want to do, you have to believe me." She says in a rush, praying he didn't flip out like Dom had when he caught them. Shawn just looks at him and gives her smile, opening his arms for her. She gets up and slips into the safety of his hug.

 

"Relax Sis, the letter said something similar, I just wanted to hear it from you." he whispers into her hair, she lets go and looks at him startled, making him Laugh. " he sort of asked me for my blessing for what happened between you two. And he gave me his number. Said if I wanted to call I could." He says running a hand through his hair, "He's a live, the son of a b***h is alive." He says, his anger slowly melting away to joy. She grins up at him and nods.

 

"YUP he really is alive, and he is as cool as you had said." she says laughing. Shawn frowns at her making her laughter stop. "What?" She asks nerves fluttering in her stomach.

 

"How did you find out it was the same Han?" He asks curiously, "The letter never explained that. it just said that you found out."  She beams at him and blushes.

 

"He was teaching me how to drift and told me about how a guy he associated with went after him and he crashed his car, everyone thought he was dead and the guy who was working under him now ran the business, Sounded alot like What happened with your Han and I put two and two together. Oh I was Pissed when he admitted it, He had known all along since the first day we met cuz I told him that my brother Shawn Bronson lived in Tokyo and was into the Drift scene." She explains as memories of the first time they drifted filtered into her mind, making her tear up. She hadn't wanted to admit it until then but she missed him. She missed his arms around her making her feel safe and loved as they laid together in his bed, she missed waking up in his arms in the morning and stealing kisses from him as he slept. Tears spill down her cheeks and she quickly wipes them away.  "He built a Mazda like the one he crashed in, Its a pretty sick car, told me once that you use to drive it along with a red Evo?" She asks. Shawn throws his head back and laughs nodding his head.

 

"Yeah I use to drive that thing, It was a pretty cool car, he has the same one back in the States now?" She nods her head

 

 "Different year though." Suddenly a knock on the screen interrupts them and Neela and Twinkie poke their heads in.

 

"You guys OK in here?" Neela asks concern for her boyfriend written on her face. Shawn stands up and ushers Katie and the others out of the office and leads them quickly back in the back rooms and head to Kate's room. "Whats going on Shawn? Is everything OK?" Neela asks her concern notching up a few. Katie looks at Shawn and tilts her head, silently asking him if he was about to tell them about Han, He nods his head slightly and hands her the picture, his way of saying that she should tell. Her mouth grows dry as she stares up into Twinkie and Neela's face. She smiles and hands them the picture.

 

"Han's Alive." She stutters asTwinkie takes the picture, whistling in disbelief when he sees Han and hands it to Neela.

 

"How is that possible? we saw his car explode?" She whispers looking up at Katie then back at the picture. Shawn hands Twinkie the Letter and he and Neela read it, Their eyes widen as they read through it. "He really is alive, and he's living with this Dom guy? Isn't that the man who took you in?" She asks looking up at Katie with confusion, her eyes glassy from unshed tears.

 

"Why didn't you tell us?" Twinkie says quietly. She looks over at him to see hurt written all over his face. She looks over at Shawn for support then turns back to Twinkie. Opening her mouth she once again tells her story. Telling them everything she could and answering their questions the best she could.

 

 

*******************

 

"Katie do you realize how late it is over here?"

 

"Dang It Really is you?" Shawn's voice says from the other side of the phone. Han sits  up in bed, all traces of sleep gone as his old friend's voice filters to him. He had been wondering when he would get this call.

 

"She finally told you I assume." He says taking his blanket off and getting out of bed. "Look I'm sorry I didn't tell you before." He says pacing his room. He hears Shawn's laugh.

 

"Its fine Han, Katie explained everything. I just wanted to give you my answer, to your question." He says his voice growing serious. Han stops his pacing and closes his eyes, bracing himself.

 

"What's your answer." He whispers.

 

" Before I give it to you you need to answer my question"

 

"Anything"

 

"Do you really Love her?" Han smiles and runs a hand through his hair

 

"Yes Shawn I do."

 

"Right Well I don't like the age difference but, I saw how her eyes lite up when she spoke of you, and I noticed before how everytime we mentioned you she would stiffen and get this really sad expression, she thought she was hiding. She really loves you back man, Even if she doesn't want to admit it right now. So my answer is Yes," He says, and Han can hear the smile in his voice making him smile. Just then A girlish Giggle followed by a low laugh enters the phone making Han open his eyes. Instantly he knew that the giggle was Katie's, but who was the guy? He hears Shawn put his hand over the phone to yell at them "Twink Stop tickling her She looks like she is going to Die from lack of oxygen from laughing so hard." He says laughter in his muffled voice. Han hears Katie ask him something, "Yes I'm talking to Han. Do you want to speak to him?" Han holds his breath as he waits for her to get on the phone, his heart feeling like it was being stabbed when Shawn gets back on the phone. "Hey I have alot of questions for you but I guess its really late there right?" he says. Han nods before remembering he couldn't see. He clears his throat.

 

"Yeah its four in the morning here and I have work at nine, call me anytime OK. Oh and Shawn do me a favor." He says

 

"What you need man?"

 

"Take care of her please." He says and hangs up. He sinks onto his bed with a sigh, his mind going a mile a minute. Did Katie read his letter? She clearly gave Shawn his, but did she read hers, or was she still so pissed off at him that she tossed it aside. And even she did read it did she believe him or just thought it was bullshit.And what was with Twinkie Tickling her? that must mean they were growing closer. Too close? Was he about to lose the girl he loved? Did he already lose her? He groans and throws his floor to the ground in frustration. F**k! Why did love have to be so complicated.