SUBLIME

SUBLIME

A Poem by FlawedByDesign

SUBLIME

Gazing into your clear night eyes,
Is like staring at the lucid stars,
Lost in the precious moment,
Wishing it would forever last,


A blind mime said to me once,
To hang on to times like these,
Serene and adolescent pure,
Too few and far between,


“Give in to your desires”, he said,
Kiss her gentle, silky smooth skin,
Raise her to dance amidst the clouds,
Set her body and mind ablaze,


Make her tremble in ecstasy,
Hold her tight in your warm embrace,
Let her come back down to earth,
A night neither of you will forget.

© 2010 FlawedByDesign


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Featured Review

You've painted this poem with a lot of emotions, and it shows!

"Raise her to dance amidst the clouds"
is a particularly eye catching sentence, in a poem full of eye catching sentences.

I wouldn't say there is much to be criticized in this write, but the meter could probably have been better, which would have added to the aesthetics of the write.

Very well done!

Posted 13 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Love, in its purest form, is transcendental and truly has the ability to lift one to another plane - a pleasure parallel of existence. You have captured the essence of love's beauty in your words - a truth that no man will forget.

Linda Marie Van Tassell

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A teasing of emotion between two adults to be held on to in memory form, and now in poetic repose. To be fair I agree that there is not much to be criticised here. I rather enjoy that you are pushing the boundaries with the meter, even though you have not used form it flows amicably, and the message is certainly clear.

I love the line "raise her to dance amidst the clouds" sexy but not too risqué. Thoroughly enjoyed the write. Keep them coming ;)

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

You've painted this poem with a lot of emotions, and it shows!

"Raise her to dance amidst the clouds"
is a particularly eye catching sentence, in a poem full of eye catching sentences.

I wouldn't say there is much to be criticized in this write, but the meter could probably have been better, which would have added to the aesthetics of the write.

Very well done!

Posted 13 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

So much emotion, and a great message. Seize the day. :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

romantic

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

harmonious silken dance of lovers ~ truly lovely~

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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1019 Views
16 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on June 26, 2010
Last Updated on June 26, 2010
Tags: poem, poetry, love, romanse, sensual, sublime, rapture, affection

Author

FlawedByDesign
FlawedByDesign

Stratford, Ontario, Canada



About
The name is Ivan - I'm 31. I am originally from Bosnia and Herzegovina. I left my country in 94 because of the civil war. After emigrating, my family lived in France for 2 years before coming to Canad.. more..

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