COLLECTION OF HAIKU I

COLLECTION OF HAIKU I

A Poem by FlawedByDesign
"

Hai - ai - kuu ...

"

DEVOID OF REASON

Cunning rancid minds -
Cesspools of irrational thought
spreading disease

NIGHTMARES

Heartbreaking malaise -
You’re the needle in my eye
lacerating dreams

BURNING OUT

Cimmerian breath -
Luminous side of life burns
unavoidably

DESIRE

Amorous ember -
Swallow you to warm my heart
ignite my passion

© 2010 FlawedByDesign


Author's Note

FlawedByDesign
I thought I'd post my Haiku in fours. Posting them one by one seems like I'm cheating the reader. I want to give you your money's worth so to speak :)

First Haiku is a modern one with 5-8-4. All the others are 5-7-5.
Tell me which one you like the most, because I think I will post that one on its own.

TY

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Reviews

I really like these!

Swallow you to warm my heart...Love it!

Posted 9 Years Ago


"Nightmares" is my favorite , "Desire" is probably the most "traditional" in form as '"amourous ember" has a seasonal refernce , and especially if "warm my "was exchanged with "my cold" to supply the cutting word ...

Haiku are fun

Posted 10 Years Ago


All superb...but my fave is Burning out, hands down. Nice work my friend.

Posted 10 Years Ago


First two are a little harsh, liked the last two. Nice job.

Posted 10 Years Ago


I love all four of them but especially the first. I think it's the "cesspool of irrational thought" that grabbed me. Good jib. I love haiku.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Great. You've used some strong vocabulary in this one, and it pays off. I'm sorry I'm unable to comment more, as I'm not really a fan of haikus.

Posted 10 Years Ago


I like all 4 of them. I love "Desire" the most though. They're all great. Can't wait to read some more from you.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Nice set of the 4, I like them all with the third being my fave

the 2 nd line in the first one has an 8 syllable count
Cesspools of irrational thought

Perhaps you might opt to replace the word >>cesspools

>>>like drains or drop the cess and just use pools~

at any rate a well crafted collection indeed...nicely DonE!


Posted 10 Years Ago


I love the third and fourth haikus the best. The third feels more ethereal to me, while the fourth indeed feels like an amorous ember.

Linda Marie

Posted 10 Years Ago


AWESOME

Posted 10 Years Ago



First Page first
Previous Page prev
1
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

967 Views
14 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on July 8, 2010
Last Updated on December 23, 2010
Tags: poem, poetry, haiku, reason, mind, nightmare, dream, life, fire, passion, love

Author

FlawedByDesign
FlawedByDesign

Stratford, Ontario, Canada



About
The name is Ivan - I'm 31. I am originally from Bosnia and Herzegovina. I left my country in 94 because of the civil war. After emigrating, my family lived in France for 2 years before coming to Canad.. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


October girls October girls

A Poem by Robin