I love you more than the things I wrote in this poem can show

When the stars we always denied
begin to change the way we decide
to live the end of our lives
I want to hear your voice so I can recognize
something familiar

For J.

23. October. 2014

Reviews

[Inject Positivity]

This is really thought provoking and very true, we ultimately get along with something familiar which we denied most of the in our life.... You captured something really interesting here...

Note: I think in the fourth line 'regocnize' should be 'recognize'....

Sincerely
Dhiman

[forgotten_ghosts]

Thank you for your nice words and the note. I guess I shouldn't post poems at night, while my grammar is asleep..

[Inject Positivity]

Haha they have a sleeping schedule too... You are most welcome dear frnd....

[wordman]

beautiful tribute i`m sure they know

[forgotten_ghosts]

Thank you very much, Sir!

[Norman 223]

I like the concept of this poem, but I feel that "stars" could be replaced with "dreams". This would have a greater impact as it would relate to real thoughts and emotions., and their influence on life , which is what the message of this poem is all about. You have a good message here, don't hide it too much..

Norman

[forgotten_ghosts]

Thanks for your advice and Norman. I'll think about it! Thank you very very much!

[Norman 223]

My aplogies, ,j.g., I have just realised the astrological connotation of your poem. Please ignore my earlier comment. In this context "stars" takes on greater significance.

Norman

[forgotten_ghosts]

No problem, Norman! Thanks again for reading!

[aLittlePain]

"to live the end of our lives"

Powerful sentiment, really interesting to perceive it in that way.
I really enjoyed it.

[forgotten_ghosts]

Thank you very much for your nice words! Glad you enjoyed it!

[Chris]

It's more than sentiment...and the fears of losing one's self as we age to our ends are quite real

[forgotten_ghosts]

Thank you! Yes, they must get bigger the more we age

[Woody]

interesting. I like the wording you chose to express the idea of "when we die".
short but a nice love poem. good start. keep at it :)

[forgotten_ghosts]

Thank you for your nice words,Woody!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

third line, did you mean "lives"?

i really like the last line, yes, "something familiar"

we may deny for awhile...but we often end up loving something or someone familiar more than we realized...

j.

[forgotten_ghosts]

Yes, that's what I meant, thank you, I didn't See that mistake.
That is exactly what I meant!
Thank you for writing this review!