Flammable Dandelion Mutterings

Flammable Dandelion Mutterings

A Poem by Frieda P

i drink you in like fine french cognac
breathe you like springtime's essence
you lift my spirits like a butterfly
when you flutterby to touch my heart,
i've lived in a castle with no vision
let down my hair in portend reluctance
trusting hands caught my presence
i lost my balance and toppled over
still wary of trespassing recalcitrance
breathless i caught a glimpse
of what I'd been missing
like sweet poetry I liquefied
a lovely taste upon the lips
still frightful after all these years
your stanza brought me to my knees
i kneel in this verse, inward hesitation
in wait for an exposition to slay
my prayer is a chant of endless mutterings
let this warm light dissipate any nagging doubts
so that i may dwell in the music of harmony's concerto
sweetness of dandelions youthful yearnings

© 2013 Frieda P


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Featured Review

I pray you always dwell in the music of harmony's concerto dear Frieda. This poem nourished me this morning, washed over me in warm breezes and gave me breath, where none had existed before. This is absoluetly beautiful. the fact that you manage to share a small piece of your creative vision each day with us is a truly wondrous gift.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

8 Years Ago

As your kind words always nourish me Jack...thank you never seems enough. x



Reviews

This piece reminds me of that first kiss - tentative and intoxicationg full of wonder and promise, a most descriptive piece, well done, good read.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

8 Years Ago

I'm glad it brought you there, thanks so much Thomas.
Your imagery always brings me into your poems, beautifully. This piece has such a gentle yearning. I like so many of the lines but wseet poetry I liquefied" really stands out for me. Great write!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

8 Years Ago

Much appreciate it Barbara!
there are some good images here but there are also some problems with your word choices - portend is out of place for its meaning as is recalcitrance. The meanings are slightly off disrupting the flow of your poetry. Also I didn't know if you intended the lines,"your stanza brought me to my knees/i kneel in this verse. . . " to have a rather sexual connotation but they did an it was a bit jarring in contrast to the tone of the poem. I liked the poem, but these few things took away from what otherwise was a very nice piece.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

clisa

8 Years Ago

recalcitrant: obstinately defiant of authority or restraint - there is a subtle difference in meanin.. read more
clisa

8 Years Ago

Also when you put women on their knees in any context it tends to be suggestive in all kinds of ways.. read more
Frieda P

8 Years Ago

I disagree but you're welcome to read my poetry any way you see fit once I put it out there...thanks.. read more
yes i ve lived long securely closed all doors
built my own world lonely melodies i hummed alone
thought i was serene and secure till you knocked my doors
shattered them to the floor and made an entry to places i kept closed
i felt shaking knees,heart trembled head dizzy lost all control
sweet poetry how you melt all my defenses,now no armor at all
fell so weak,and on to my knees i pray for more,slave,of things i never dreamed
now i seek sweet harmony,i missed for long,how sweet
lovely write..

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

8 Years Ago

You read me well, thanks so much for your thoughts here.
prequel or sequel to the Castle piece?

splendid wording as always..and that feeling that "okay my walls have crumbled, you have done that...so let me bathe in your warmth, let me give myself to you"

i have been missing love like sweet poetry...i like that concept...it is time to feel the words again, to feel the emotion again.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

8 Years Ago

Ha good question jacob, not sure I know the answer to that one, thanks!
Enchantment. I do that. Good one

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

8 Years Ago

Ha i'm sure you do Baby, I"m sure you do...thanks.
I want to float away on a cloud.. sweet ray of light this was awesome.
" like sweet poetry I liquefied
a lovely taste upon the lips" Wow Frieda..your poetry takes me to places.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

8 Years Ago

Ha I must admit your reviews always tickle me Kee! ;-)
I see you've portrayed the feeling of melting afront someone loved, the feeling of wanting to be nothing at all. I find that feeling quite addicting . . .

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

8 Years Ago

Glad you went there with this one Tai, thanks.
like sweet poetry I liquified......oh! I like that line!

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

8 Years Ago

Glad you did Neva, thanks.
I love the homage to Rapunzel in this, the mix of fairy tale and poetry - beautiful words and music - you've spun a stellar poem.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Frieda P

8 Years Ago

Love the word 'stellar', thanks so much, happy you enjoyed this one TL.

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Added on April 26, 2013
Last Updated on April 26, 2013

Author

Frieda P
Frieda P

NJ



About
If you want to know me, read my poetry, it's all in there. I am a mother of three sons (my finest moments) a sister, a survivor and a little bit crazy. I lost my beloved sister to suicide, so you'll.. more..

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