Can You Hear Her?

All the tears that she cry

No one ever asks her why

They say she will be alright

But they don’t know the pain 

Inside of her heart

Can you hear her

I’m calling out for help

Don’t say you know what it’s like

You have never seen her cry

She is hurting on the inside

She has her arms open wide

Just give it a try

I promise it will be alright

Help her find herself

Take this torn heart off the shelf

Hear her cries for love

She wants it from above

THE END

Reviews

[IWarieeth]

i can feel the heart crying out in pain

[AFRODITE STATHI]

Loved your work.It is very true and sensitive.Bravo.

[Akshay Rawal]

Hi, The feeling behind the poem is very on point. I can definitely say this poem is straight from the heart. Subjectively speaking, this poem definitely touches at certain points, especially the line "don't say what's its like" because people commonly say "I know what it's like" as a way of consolation.

Critically speaking, the poem could have a better structure. Some lines do rhyme well, for example, the first one :-

All the tears that she cry
No one ever asks her why

And,

She is hurting on the inside
She has her arms open wide

Now, you have taken creative liberty to turn the words around and change it from 'arms wide open' as said in common lingo, to 'arms open wide' just to match the rhyme. Maybe you didn't want to rhyme this entire piece, which I understand. But this piece has potential, but there's room to accommodate rhyming in order to make this piece more thoughtful and memorable.

Thanks
Akshay

[Lia Columbus]

Oh! It's sad to know that loneliness grows like a parasite feeding on positivity. The world hasn't run out of goodness yet. It's just that those who give love and those who want love are united very rarely.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Another pathos filled piece that once again describes the growing pains of discovering feelings and that mystery known as love.