Roller Skating Romance

Roller Skating Romance

A Poem by haymaker14
"

Yeahhh..

"
He rolls away with just a glance.
 You don't know him But boy is he cute!
 You can feel the love,
 he sends through his stares

His beautifal blue eyes smiling at you.
 He skates on over just to talk to YOU! 
Your heart skips a beat 
 your dream might come true!

 After chats and laughters,
 a slow song comes on.
 Hey guys! 
Bring out your beautiful young ladies The intercom sings

 He takes your hands tight,
 and pulls you with little of his might. 
You slow skate around gazing around. 

You know you like him,
 he likes you too.
 You confirm that to him,
 and he leans in for a kiss.

You slowly lean in,
accepting it all.
Fireworks flash,
you feel like you are the only ones there.

The slow song slowly fades to it's end
you really would like to kiss him again.
He helps you off the ring,
and he holds you so tight.

It is so silent now,
but he is smiling.
His white teeth
glimmer at you.

What a perfect night,
you think too yourself.
Goodbye he says,
I will see you again...

© 2013 haymaker14


Author's Note

haymaker14
Please review!!!!!!

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Reviews

i can visualize this scene in my head (maybe its just because i enjoy roller skateing) very cute piece, i enjoyed reading it.

Posted 7 Years Ago


haymaker14

7 Years Ago

Glad you like it! I love roller skating too!I tried to make imagery as much as possible! Thanks!
chaotic katie

7 Years Ago

anytime
I like the classic romance story being told. You should however, go back and edit the spelling errors. Since you are telling such a classic story you may also considered sticking to a structure and meter. It doesn't seem/ that you are trying to stick to a rhyme scheme/ so for the fluidity/ of poetry, this you may consider/ one line per moment/ stacked into a picture/ like layers Master the Mountain...

Posted 7 Years Ago


haymaker14

7 Years Ago

Thanks for reviewing and helping me become a better writer. Will you point out the spelling errors f.. read more
A slight nostic feel to this piece, it creates a balance of options to take for the reader,w ell done, good read.

Posted 7 Years Ago


haymaker14

7 Years Ago

Thanks for reviewing! I'm happy you enjoyed it. Thank you also for what you said :)
Thomas Fitzgerald

7 Years Ago

your welcome.

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286 Views
3 Reviews
Added on April 7, 2013
Last Updated on April 7, 2013
Tags: Romance, Young love, Boys

Author

haymaker14
haymaker14

About
I am a female who ADORES reading and writing! I love writing poems! I love limericks but I don't write them much. I hope you enjoy my writing and my perspective on the world. I LOVE reviews, if it's b.. more..

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